Hey guys, I need your help as soon as possible
 

Hey foreign Japanese friends,
I'm a drama student in canada, and I really do need your help for one of my school assignments, which is to learn a foreign accent and perform it in front of a live audience. This quite challenging since all my classmates are doing either french or english accents, well to me they are considered cliche... So~! out of my great interest in the Japanese culture, I really wanna to learn a japanese accent!! which is totally cool and impressive. So to help me achieve my goal, your help is desperatelly needed!!! (I'm still not sure if I made my post in the correct forum..)
Anyways, I have this short stroy which has all the phonetic alphabet sound covered. So if anyone can read it with an Japanese accent and record it and sent the sound track to me I'd feel more than indebted~~~and I need it as soon as possible!! my e-mail address is sherrymp3@gmail.com , and If anyone wants to be my pen pal in the future, he or she is more than welcomed!~~

Here goes the story:

Arthur the Rat
Once there was a young rat named Arthur, who could never make up his mind. Whenever his friends asked him if he would like to go out with them, he would only answer, "I don't know." He wouldn't say "yes" or "no" either. He would always shirk making a choice.
His aunt Helen said to him, "Now look here. No one is going to care for you if you carry on like this. You have no more mind than a blade of grass."
One rainy day, the rats heard a great noise in the loft. The pine rafters were all rotten, so that the barn was rather unsafe. At last the joists gave way and fell to the ground. The walls shook and all the rats' hair stood on end with fear and horror. "This won't do," said the captain. "I'll send out scouts to search for a new home."
Within five hours the ten scouts came back and said, "We found a stone house where there is room and board for us all. There is a kindly horse named Nelly, a cow, a calf, and a garden with an elm tree." The rats crawled out of their little houses and stood on the floor in a long line. Just then the old one saw Arthur. "Stop," he ordered coarsely. "You are coming, of course?" "I'm not certain," said Arthur, undaunted. "The roof may not come down yet." "Well," said the angry old rat, "we can't wait for you to join us. Right about face. March!"
Arthur stood and watched them hurry away. "I think I'll go tomorrow," he calmly said to himself, but then again "I don't know; it's so nice and snug here."
That night there was a big crash. In the morning some men—with some boys and girls—rode up and looked at the barn. One of them moved a board and he saw a young rat, quite dead, half in and half out of his hole. Thus the shirker got his due.

(well, It's kind of long, but thank you for you help!!)

I think you are delusional.

If you wanted to read the story in Japanese, then we would be talking, but when ask for it in a "Japanese accent" we are getting into dangerous waters. In Japan a "Japanese accent" in English is the same thing as "a bad English speaker".

I am not going to use the "r" word, but I were in the room and saw a non-Japanese reading something in a "Japanese accent" I would walk out of the room.

something
 

OK, I think I need justify my point a little bit further. First, I'm doing this only for an academic purpose, which is to better my ability to adapt to different languages. And how is the existance of "japanese accent" wrong, when a considerable number of people around the world are busy learning a british or french accent? Are the French speaking english poorly? or the scottish cannot speak english properly? or russell peters is only discriminating his own people when he use an indian accent in his acts? Accents only indicate one's origin and should mean nothing else. it does not mean that one is a bad english speaker when speaking with an accent.
Correct me if I'm wrong

1) There is no academic value in learning a "Japanese accent"

2) In the US speaking in a "Japanese accent" is a little like putting on black face and speaking in ebonics. It is offensive.

3) You see British actors learning American accents and American actors learning European accents, but in this day and age you do not see American or European actors speaking in Japanese or Chinese accents. Why? Because it would be offensive.

Whether or not accents should only indicate place or origin, when you are talking about an essentially homogeneous society from an island country like Japan it is different and you are getting into racial issues.

There is no right way or good way for a non-Japanese to imitate a "Japanese accent". There is no pride in Japan for a "Japanese accent" in English like there is in England for an "English accent". Japanese who try to learn English well try to speak without an Japanese accent, so by using one it is demeaning.

I am not calling you a racist, I am just saying this is a very bad idea.

...
 

oh well, one more option turned down on my list...
I'm not doing it just because it might be offensive to "certain" groups people and I don't want to be entitled as an racist.
And there's no wrong if someone tries to right this demented world although she is just too negligible to be regarded.

and btw, try to argue the russell peters case, are they the similar situation?

Not "certain groups"...it would be offensive to all Japanese people.

Are you of Japanese descent?

no I'm not, but I'm partially asian...
are you?

No. But Russell Peters' father is from Bombay, so he can get away with doing an Indian accent just like Margaret Cho can get away with doing a Korean accent. They are also both professional comedians, so they get a little more leeway that way.

I am not trying to attack you, but just point you in the right direction...there is no right way for you to pull this off, so I would give it up.

Neither am I trying to struggle to make sense out of insanity, Just having a great time arguing and learning~~~
well, nice talking to you, at least I learnt something new, as a stupid kid~! (and btw, i'm really is a kid, so I can get away with asking inexperienced questions~)

It's not insanity, just cultural identity and racial sensitivity, and there are plenty of non-kids that still struggle with those things.

ok~ end of argument~~
Q.E.D.

And may I ask, what do you do? if that's not too personal...

Click on my avatar...it's in my profile.

cooooooool, media reviewer~ so you are a critic?

I suppose that is another way of saying it.

...
 

... yes... you are a critic

Take the safer route and stick to at least a western accent. As a former drame teacher I think I understand the intent of the exercise, so perhaps these would suffice.

Strong southern drawl
Western US "cowboy" with strong "twag"
Brooklyn (very distinct and frequently used)
German
Swedish

I would have included Spanish or Italian, but unless your are reaaly good its going to blur with French for most listeners.

And since you mentioned English is too common, are you referring to the Queen's English, Cockney, Welsh or Scottish? They vary considerably when done correctly.

To do an accent that you cannot back up visually on stage is a wasted effort, since you will only be cast if you physically fit the role as well as vocally. You mentioned being part Asian, but the issue is the visual image nor the genetics.

The most critical person on these forums, no doubt.

It's hard to begin with how wrong this sounded. What I pretty much heard was, "All you white people can mimic each other and your different accents, but don't mimic another races'." Because there are no other races in those countries with those accents... yeah.

You consistently say that these things are offensive, but you never say why. Also, why would mimicking a western accent not be offensive? This is clearly a double standard with a strong bias. Do you believe that no other language is held with pride by other people besides the Japanese? Why would they not be offended in the same situation? Why would anyone be offended at all? This is not some bad comedy skit mocking a race, it's the recognition of the blending of sounds of separate languages.

To the TC, you can easily find some native Japanese speaker speaking English on youtube or something. The accent is quite often very thick and hard to understand. Also, because they are "essentially homogeneous society from an island country", their accent is not very recognizable. Also, it sounds bad (stuffy, blended, completely missing some sounds) to the western ear due to the limited sounds from Japanese as well as the lack of exposure to westerners. For this reason, I'd go for a more accepted accent like German, Spanish, ect. which are far more recognizable and still have the diverse sounds of English.

IcewindDude, I must have done something to offend you, because now it feels like you are following me around and just picking apart my posts.


That's not what I said at all, but it is clear you are not reading my posts without some agenda.

I did explain why a non-Japanese doing a "Japanese accent" would be offensive to Japanese.

I am saying there are some accents she could get away with and some she couldn't. Yes, that is a double standard. If she did a cowboy accent it would be fine, but a Japanese accent would be offensive. It's not my standard though, it's the way it is.

Are you serious? Like I said before, there is no right way to do a Japanese accent that wouldn't be offensive. I said nothing about "no other language" and there are probably hundreds of cultures that would be offended if a non-native took their "accent" and imitated it on stage. What makes Japanese even worse though is there is a history of racism specifically against the Japanese in America, and a history of mocking in movies and cartoons, especially during wartime. When you choose a historically oppressed people as the target of attention (the Japanese), take an aspect of the culture that has been used to oppress (their accent) and showcase it on stage, that is offensive.

Dude, if you can comfortably write those bolded sentences it's no wonder you don't understand what I am talking about.

Have any of you guys seen Meet Joe Black with Brad Pitt? If so, do you know if it was Brad Pitt himself that done the Jamaican (as far as I can remember, correct me if I'm wrong) accent?

That was the really long movie, right? I never saw that one...