[Twisted]

Sorry for butting in, but me thinks we're losing track of the point of the discussion. In the last two pages this discussion heated up, resulting in some finger pointing and hard language. Little love in a thread that discusses it's nature...

To "douse the flames" a little I would argue the following:

Love is selfish.

Now before you start staggering on your hind legs and throw arguments in my direction, let me elaborate.

First of all, what is selfishness? I personally define selfishness as actions or ways of thinking focussed on ones own gain.

Why do we fall in love? Because deep in our genes there is a need for a mate. We need a mate (in general) to procreate or to complete oneself. Therefore, it centres around the individual. His or her needs, desires and drives.

Love, as an emotion, can truly f*ck you up. It can mess with you on so many levels that you can't begin to fathom how "love" has installed itself in our every day lives.

Why donate for Tahiti? Because these people need help? Yes, but doesn't it give you status as well? It makes you feel a better person. You've helped those poor people by making it possible that food is bought.

So helping other can be out of a need that needs to be fulfilled. Loving someone and feeling loved are some of those needs. A parents love, wanting the best for their children can be altruism. "I want my children to have all those thing I didn't have as a kid.". A need to see them happy because it makes you happy. Again, a need. One needs to feel happy, ones happiness is at the centre of ones existence. Without happiness there is no hope, without hope one loses the will to live.

It boils down to this: survival and recognition.

Love works on many levels. It creates bonds en exists in many forms. But these forms are based on needs. Love can be inconvenient. It can make you sick to the point you could die. There are stories of people who died because they couldn't live without their partner. They simply gave up the will to live. These stories may be fiction, but it does demonstrate love's power.

Love has a hold on us, whether we like it or not. We have no say in it. It can bring forth the best in us, but also the worst in us. Love, as a emotion, is selfish. It dominates your life and dictates your actions with friends, family, you life mate and others. It drives you to fulfil its needs or causes you to feel miserable because you didn't. It can bring forth happiness, but also hatred and jealousy. Yes, love has strange bedfellows.

So, for those who went "tl;dr" here: Love is a selfish emotion centred around fulfilling it's needs.

In short: "love's a b*tch at some times, an angel the others.".