[Sarugetchu]

I honestly don't know how to thank you enough for this, I'm not even sure I can put into words how grateful I am. Thank you so, so much!! I never expected anyone to give up that much time/effort to be so thorough, thank you!

Originally Posted by masaegu

Hmm, same mistake for the second time. Maybe you don't know about the distiction. The verb is ある here and to go with it, you MUST use に. When you have an action verb like "kill", "eat", "run", use で.

I wasn't actually aware of this rule, and I don't know how I've come this far without looking into it properly or stumbling across it. In fact I remember asking my teacher in Japan about the distinction and was told you have to learn on a case by case basis, which I never understood. Thank you, I won't forget it now! (same goes for the kodomo kanji, and みたいに!)

I hope you don't mind if I just ask a few questions about some of the corrections I didn't understand fully. Of course please just ignore them if you're sick of this text, you've already helped me more than enough.

Originally Posted by masaegu

私は初めてメードキッサに行った時、意外に高いケーキ を注文したら、メードのお姉さんは早く持ってきて、歌を歌い始めました。

Think of the meaning and decide which of the two はやく's you need to use.

I'm not actually aware of the difference if I'm honest. I'm not great with kanji. Is 速く more related to speed (eg. quickly) and 早くmore to do with time of day (eg. early)?

Originally Posted by masaegu

メードの性的魅力に関して気にしなくても、その かわいさ物が女の人を引きつけます。

meaning?

Firstly, I changed かわいさ物 to かわいい物
I was going for the meaning "Even if they are not interested in the ‘sexuality’ of the maids, this cute image appeals to women." Does this sentence not mean that? I found this really difficult to say.
Unless, are you suggesting that I follow this up with a sentence concluding what it means that Maid Cafes appeal to women? I got a little confused.

Originally Posted by masaegu

メード喫茶と違って相手のホステスはいつも客のそばに いるので、客は入る瞬間から帰るときまでの時間にお金を払わなければなりません。

入った
時間に対し

Does using 時間に対しmeanalong the lines of "according to time" or "in relation to the time"?

Originally Posted by masaegu

それに、男の人だけのためのものなんです。もちろん同 性愛者を考慮していません。

は

I was a bit confused by using は in this sentence. I wanted to say "They certainly do not consider gay people." but wouldn't changing 同性愛者 to the subject make it "Gay people do not consider it"? Should I perhaps change it to もちろん同性愛者は考慮さられていません。? I find this a bit confusing.

Originally Posted by masaegu

メードの女性かホステスは自分の私生活が生けるので現代的な女性を代表ですが、仕事で男性に従順であ ることが期待されています。

You have no choice but to use や.
生ける？？？？
期待されています　＞　求められています

Probably a silly question, but why do I have no choice?
Also, my use of ikeru was because I was trying to say "Maids or hostesses can live their own private life so they represent the modern woman, but in their work they are expected to be submissive to men." Would it just be better with 私生活ができる　?

Originally Posted by masaegu

やがてお姉さんは私に歌ってもらいたいことに気づいて 、一緒に歌を歌ってしまいました。手でハートの形を作 りながら、ケーキを狙って、「おいしくな～れ、おいし くな～れ、萌え、萌え、ぴょんんん～！」と歌ったので す。その子供っぽい振る舞いは誇張することですが、日本人はそのよ うなかわいいイメージが好きなようだと思います。

Awkward. ＞　好きなように思います/好きなように見えます/好きなのではないかと思います

I see how this is awkward now, but I just was wondering about ように思います, which I noticed you again mentioned later. Is this like saying "I think along these lines"? Just so I can use it again in the future.



Thank you sooooo much again! This is much more useful than my classes. I'll post my rewrite with all these additions (and some additional silly mistakes fixed) in this post for comparison for anybody hoping to use this example as a study tool.