Please correct errors in my English compositoin

[aiaiaiai]

I will write the history of native martial arts of Japan.
For example,they are "Kendo","Judo"and so on.

Let's start with "Kendo".

The Body of "Kendo" is a variety of old school of Japanese swordplay.
Native swordplay of Japan is named "Kenjyutu" in Japan.
The origin of "Kenjyutu" dates back to ancient times.
They say it was about B.C 1 century.
But we can't call it Kenjyutu.
Because It wasn't fomed as a system of fighting skill.
Besides it,people used sword made of bronze.
A sword made of iron was introduced from China in about D.C 7 century and
it swept through Japan in D.C 8 century.

The first stage of development is in Heian period(about from 8 to 12 century)
In this time people formed "Busi" group as a combatant.
It is because the goverment didn't accept fomal forces and police power in capital city.
That is to say,people in rural area was forsed to form group with fighting skills to self-defense.
Blade desended from China had gradually changed into sword of japanese style"Nihontou" in this time.
(Japanese swords became double-handed style in Heian period.)

The secondary stage is in Sengoku period(about from 1467 or 1493 to 1573).
Japanese swords wasn't major weapon in war.
The reason is that one can't chop the enemy with a armor.
That is why main weapon in war was huge swords,spear,or rod.
It's said that the lords among many parts hier "sumo wrestler" to form group with huge sword or rod.
one can't chop the enemy with a solid armor,so aim to stab or cut gap of the aromor's joint part.
That is why "Busi" often grappled with enemy,which made "Jyujyutu" precursor of "Jyudo".

The third stage is in Edo period.(about from 1600 or 1603 to 1867).
The above "kenjyutu" form is much different from that of Edo period.
Various schools developed in Edo period assume the situation that one have a battle against enemy without a armor.
Light clothes made for much skills.
This is to say, motion was impossible until now became possible.

[Amnell]

I'm guessing this is for a school paper?

I corrected some grammar and spelling. I'll give some explanations below the composition:

The Body of "Kendo" consists of a variety of old school styles of Japanese swordplay. The native swordplay of Japan is called "Kenjyutu" in Japan.
The origin of "Kenjyutu" dates back to ancient times. It is believed to have originated about the first century B.C. However, we don't call it Kenjyutsu because it was not formed as a system of combative skills. Moreover, people used swords which were made of bronze. In the seventh century B.C., a sword made from Iron was introduced to Japan from China. This new design swept through Japan during the eighth century.

The first stage of development was during Heian period (approximately from the eighth to twelfth centuries). At this time, people formed the "Bushi" group–a class of professional combatants–because the goverment didn't accept fomal forces and police power in capital city.
That is to say, people in rural areas were forced to form groups of people with fighting skills in order to defend themselves.

The blade that came from China had gradually changed into a sword of Japanese style, the "Nihontou", during this time (Japanese swords became double-handed style in Heian period.).

The secondary stage is in Sengoku period (approximately from 1467 or 1493 to 1573). Japanese swords were not major weapon in war, yet. The reason for this was that one can't chop the enemy with armor. The weapons of choice were weapons which were effective against armour–long swords, spears, and staves.

It's said that the lords among many parts hier "sumo wrestler" to form group with huge sword or rod.(?)
One can't chop the enemy with solid armor, so they instead aim to stab or cut at gaps at the armor's joints. This is why "Bushi" often grappled with enemy, which is where "Jyujyutsu", the precursor of "Jyudo", comes from.

The third stage is in the Edo period.(approxiamtely from 1600 or 1603 to 1867). The above "kenjyutu" form is much different from that of Edo period. The various schools that developed during the Edo period assumed a situation in which one would have to battle against an enemy without armor. Light clothes allowed for new, highly skilled techniques that could not be performed with the weight and lesser mobility of a suit of armour.

A lot of word changes were nuance related ("can't" to "don't" in "But we can't call it Kenjyutsu"). Those ones you'll have to really study to figure out why you would use one and not the other when either is correct.

In that same sentence, you used "but" and I changed it to "however". This is because in English, especially during a formal composition, it is grammatically incorrect to begin a sentence with a conjunction. However, the word "however", while it means almost the same thing as "but", is not considered a conjunction and therefore safe to begin a sentence with.

Scan through the edit and the original for all the places that I added "the". In Japanese, you don't really use a lot of articles. In English, they're very important. You use them almost every time you refer to a certain object ("THE Edo Period" "THE art of Kendo" etc).

You'll also notice I combined a couple of sentences. Where you ended the sentence with a period, I combined it with the next sentence by using the dash (two hyphens in most word processors: -- ) or with a comma and a conjunction (such as "and").

Finally, a big change I made was trying to discern where your paragraphs end and begin. I don't know how this is done in Japanese yet, but in English, you indent the beginning of every paragraph (the Tab key or about five presses of the space bar). Depending on your desired format and type of composition, you can either leave a blank line between paragraphs or not. Typically, you do not except for a major change in topic. It was a little hard to tell where your paragraphs were, though. Traditionally, a paragraph in a composition like this has the topic in the first sentence (what you're going to say and why), supporting details in the next few sentences, and a closing--usually one sentence long--that essentially restates the topic sentence.

Over all, good job! I'd be happy to help with any others!

[aiaiaiai]

There was a interesting point as for your opinion.
May I ask a question?

We don't call it "Kenjyutu".○
We can't call it "Kenjyutu".×

In this case,the usage of "don't" means that we Japanese don't call it as custom in general??
In the case of "can't",we have a little possibility of that??

When I write sentences like that next time,
corrected sentence is very useful.

Thank you!I will write composition related to various jenres.
My morgue is Japanese Wikipedia.

[Retrogamer77]

Originally Posted by Amnell

I
In that same sentence, you used "but" and I changed it to "however". This is because in English, especially during a formal composition, it is grammatically incorrect to begin a sentence with a conjunction. However, the word "however", while it means almost the same thing as "but", is not considered a conjunction and therefore safe to begin a sentence with.

Well, if you're going to get technical then all of the contractions should be changed as well. (don't= do not, etc.) In formal writing contractions are not allowed.

[Amnell]

Originally Posted by Retrogamer77

Well, if you're going to get technical then all of the contractions should be changed as well. (don't= do not, etc.) In formal writing contractions are not allowed.

True enough, though "however" is supposedly more universal than contractions, I believe. As in you're supposed to use "however" everytime you write any kind of composition (fiction or scientific journal) whereas contractions are only excluded from compositions such as expository or analytical essays or a scientific or legal document.

But I could be wrong.

Originally Posted by aiaiaiai

May I ask a question?

We don't call it "Kenjyutu".○
We can't call it "Kenjyutu".×

In this case,the usage of "don't" means that we Japanese don't call it as custom in general??
In the case of "can't",we have a little possibility of that??

As I said, it's more of a nuance issue than a grammatical one. Nuance is by far the hardest thing to learn of any language (barring colloquialisms).

I guess if I had to describe the difference, using "don't" vs "can't" gives one of these impressions:

Don't: It simply isn't done.
Can't: It's not possible/you can't do it.

In that sentence, the way it is phrased and the information around it implies that there is a good reason we don't call it that, even though, technically, we probably could call it that. Or rather, one might think that we would call it kenjutsu, but we actually don't "because ... ".

That's about as well as I can explain it. Nuance is difficult--mostly because not even native speakers truly understand it and therefore cannot really explain it. It's just something you know intuitively.

[Retrogamer77]

Originally Posted by Amnell

True enough, though "however" is supposedly more universal than contractions, I believe. As in you're supposed to use "however" everytime you write any kind of composition (fiction or scientific journal) whereas contractions are only excluded from compositions such as expository or analytical essays or a scientific or legal document.

But I could be wrong.

I just finished an Expository writing class and we were simply not allowed to use contractions at all. On the other hand, she is a hardcore grammar person and her mother was a Latin teacher. So it might not be practical when only using it for report purposes. Frankly, I think it depends on the teacher; some teachers simply don't care. And I agree fully that However is supposed to be used. 'But' is pretty colloquial(?), for lack of a better word, and just flows easier in writing.

Originally Posted by Amnell

That's about as well as I can explain it. Nuance is difficult--mostly because not even native speakers truly understand it and therefore cannot really explain it. It's just something you know intuitively.

Sooo, true.

[aiaiaiai]

＞Retrogamer77
Are you a teacher of English?
I can't often distinguish colloquial words from written words.

[aiaiaiai]

I will introduce one of the Japanese traditional arts -the Bonseki-.
Bonseki is that using a few rocks and sand on a lacquerd black tray show a beautiful scenery.the rocks show a mountain or mountains and sand do sea or river.

[Retrogamer77]

Originally Posted by aiaiaiai

＞Retrogamer77
Are you a teacher of English?
I can't often distinguish colloquial words from written words.

I'm a freshman in college but I've been in honors english classes all through highschool. Therefore, I could probably help you with the basics of English grammar. I would also probably be able to help you distinguish between most colloquial and proper grammar. Just let me know if you need any help.

[aiaiaiai]

Thank you,but I can't say it exactly that what is the problem.
It's too wide range.

For instance,
say,speak→discuss,imply,argue,refer to,mouth,remark and so on...

When I find a individual problem,I want to ask a question.
Thank you!