Japanese Ladies

[manofculture]

I have traveled to many different countries. As a Black man, from the USA, I have been treated okay. However, I have noticed during my travels and while living in the United States that Asian woman, particularly Japanese woman, are not friendly in general towards Black men. Why is that? I have been told that Japanese ladies put White European and North American men on a pedestal and that they treat them like Gods. In return, a lot of Asian woman end up been treated like a second class citizen because the Caucasian man feels that he can do no wrong. Asian woman end up being battered and abused. Not wanting to admit to themselves and their families that the "god" they have married is not a prince in shining armor, they stay in the marriage although being miserable. SURELY, this is not the case in all Asian Woman/ Caucasian men marriages but it is problem. There are many "successful" marriages. However, the marriage is a success because the Asian lady stay in the shadows and don't demand to be respected and be an equal. This is my observation and opinion. You can count on one hand, how many Japanese ladies are married to Black men from any country, not just the USA. If an Asian lady is reading this, she will have to admit that a lot of what I said is true. That's if she is honest. I have nothing against Caucasian men. Its not there fault that the stereotype exists in their favor. They are just reaping the benefits of the stereotype while the Asian male is seen for the most part as not been "adequate enough", sitting on the sidelines as more and more Asian ladies find themselves living in a fantasy world. Tell me what you think. Before you become upset and going on the defensive, look at the facts.

[Ronin4hire]

What facts?

You've just given us your experiences and interpreted them as being representative of reality.

I would be careful comparing Japanese people and Japanese Americans. Completely different.

I might be able to agree with you about Japanese Americans harbouring negative sentiments towards black people but that's only because those irrational sentiments are spread across all Americans to some degree (even those that openly reject such ways of seeing black people are at least familiar with the stereotypes).

But Japanese women in Japan, I cannot even guess what the general feeling is. But my experiences say the opposite of yours.

When I was an exchange student in Japan, one of the most popular exchange students on campus was an American who was black (and ESPECIALLY with women).

I also have a friend who is dating a Canadian who is black.

Though on the other hand... the most black people I've seen in Japan are Africans who stand outside strip clubs in Roppongi trying to get you to visit their brother/strip club.

So who knows what the truth is....

Just don't let stuff like that get to you dude!

Assholes are assholes no matter what the colour of their skin.

[kakurenbo]

I think a lot of men use race (among other things) as an excuse on why they can't get a girl. It can't be that your personality isn't what she's looking for, it has to be because the women are racist. Even women who do have a racial preference will date a man off their "no dating" list if there is enough chemistry.

[Ronin4hire]

Originally Posted by kakurenbo

I think a lot of men use race (among other things) as an excuse on why they can't get a girl. It can't be that your personality isn't what she's looking for, it has to be because the women are racist. Even women who do have a racial preference will date a man off their "no dating" list if there is enough chemistry.

I couldn't disagree with you more.

I think conceptions of race hinder the way in which people view others and even in the way people view themselves and they are very real.

This includes dating.

"Even women who do have a racial preference will date a man off their "no dating" list if there is enough chemistry"

Bullsh*t. This is just something that racists say in order to soften their prejudice.

[kakurenbo]

Originally Posted by Ronin4hire

I couldn't disagree with you more.

I think conceptions of race hinder the way in which people view others and even in the way people view themselves and they are very real.

This includes dating.

"Even women who do have a racial preference will date a man off their "no dating" list if there is enough chemistry"

Bullsh*t. This is just something that racists say in order to soften their prejudice.

Well I guess I'm a racist who's softening the prejudice to her husband of 4 years.

[Ronin4hire]

Originally Posted by kakurenbo

Well I guess I'm a racist who's softening the prejudice to her husband of 4 years.

No... you're a former racist who overcame your former prejudice to marry someone you love. (i.e. the result of circumstance and the exception not the rule.)

Unless you're saying that you still have those prejudices....

In which case you're married to someone you don't really love.

[kakurenbo]

Originally Posted by Ronin4hire

No... you're a former racist who overcame your former prejudice to marry someone you love.

Unless you're saying that you still have those prejudices....

In which case you're married to someone you don't really love.

So having a preference equals racism and having prejudices to you? I would agree if I said I would never date a certain race but to say I prefer another race I don't consider it racism. Like someone preferring a taller guy, women with larger breasts, blue eyes, blonde hair, a car hobby, skill in the kitchen.

Let's say I had a preference of blue men over red men. I would date a nice red man before giving a mean blue man the time of day. But if I saw both men out on the street and I had 2 seconds to check a guy out I would probably check the blue man out. If that's racism I think this world is getting way too sensitive and I will happily shout out my so called racism.

And yes I still do have those "prejudices". If my husband and I were to split (knock on wood) I would still prefer blue men to red men. Doesn't make me love my husband any less though.

[Ronin4hire]

Originally Posted by kakurenbo

So having a preference equals racism and having prejudices to you?

Yes.. though if it makes you feel any better I'm friends with a lot of racists in this sense and in no way do I put it on the same level as hateful racism. It's ignorant racism. Ignorant because it's ultimately based on unfounded and irrational assumptions.

As for your husband... I cannot comment on your relationship dynamic. But if you can imagine someone who could make you happier well... I'm just going to say it's not an ideal relationship for me.

[Ronin4hire]

Also.. I want to add that it's not quite the same as superficial attraction to physical features.

Race is not a physical feature. It's a psychological condition based on physical features.

[OHayou]

I've heard that Japanese women lust after Black men because they're "exotic".
I've heard that Japanese women prefer White men because White skin is "exotic".
I've heard that Japanese women don't like Black men.
I've heard that Japanese women really don't prefer anyone but Japanese.
I've heard that you're tired of reading someone typing "I've heard" excessively...