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-   -   Romance in Japan... Is reality always bitter? (http://www.japanforum.com/forum/relationship-talk/22542-romance-japan-reality-always-bitter.html)

TomoyaIchigo 01-19-2009 06:00 AM

Romance in Japan... Is reality always bitter?
 
Alrite... Ladies n Gentleman, Guys n Gals... What do you think about romance in Japan? How is it like having BF or GF?

Lately I've been reading lots of romantic mangas.

Most of the plot are based on school life and they were written as if japanese guys are either perverted or really idiot who doesn't even know what a girl want. On the other hand, the girls, in manga, are very pretty, yet they fight each other to be GF of those good-for-nothing male lead.

Guys... I mean no offense here. I know most of japan guys are really bright and talented. But how do you guys feel about those character in manga. Are there such boy n girl in Japan? Or are they just wild imagination of over-perverted mangaka's thoughts?

Girls.. how about you all? Do you think you will do something like that in those manga if you like a guy? How do you feel about those manga? What kinda guy you want as your BF?

I'm really curious about this since I read a few romance manga. I read I''s, Suzuka and a few more. If you know better manga let me know too. Hope to hear what you all have to say about this.

P.S. I'm not japanese nor live in Japan. So, I know nothing about this. Pls do care to share some experience. And I would like to have a few friend who wanna talk about this with me. Matta ne. :D :vsign: :rheart:

Keaton421 01-19-2009 06:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TomoyaIchigo (Post 666300)
P.S. I'm not japanese nor live in Japan. So, I know nothing about this.

That's painfully obvious.

You're comparing comic books and reality. That's your first problem.

And it's mata ne :)

Ronin4hire 01-19-2009 06:09 AM

I have no idea either... but I'm guessing that manga is not a reliable way to gain insight into Japanese culture.

Also... how is Singapore culture?

Maybe I'd consider the Japanese way more "normal" and the Singapore way "messed up"? In other words... whatever the reality is... it's best not to be judgemental.

bELyVIS 01-19-2009 06:18 AM

Japanese guys are very shy and according to my wife have no clue as to what Japanese girls want.
A lot of Japanese (not all) are immature due to their upbringing and culture. I think this is the generalization you see in manga. It might be a little true but not everyone is this way.

bELyVIS 01-19-2009 06:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bELyVIS (Post 666310)
A lot of Japanese (not all) are immature due to their upbringing and culture. I think this is the generalization you see in manga. It might be a little true but not everyone is this way.

I'm sorry, I meant a lot of Japanese girls.

Ronin4hire 01-19-2009 06:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bELyVIS (Post 666310)
Japanese guys are very shy and according to my wife have no clue as to what Japanese girls want.
A lot of Japanese (not all) are immature due to their upbringing and culture. I think this is the generalization you see in manga. It might be a little true but not everyone is this way.

Interesting... If I were to generalise based on my experiences, I would conclude that Japanese women are MORE mature than Western.

I think the reality is that neither of our experiences count for much when making such generalisations.

cridgit001 01-19-2009 06:29 AM

I also would like some more info on this part of the culture as this kind of stuff facinates me.

@bELyVIS- You commented that your wife said that Japanese men didn't know what the girls wanted. Could you expand on this please.

Keaton421 01-19-2009 07:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cridgit001 (Post 666316)
I also would like some more info on this part of the culture as this kind of stuff facinates me.

@bELyVIS- You commented that your wife said that Japanese men didn't know what the girls wanted. Could you expand on this please.

Actually, my (Japanese) girlfriend has said this a lot too.

She says that in physique, Japanese males look weak (silly, effeminate hairstyles and stupid trendy clothes), and they don't possess qualities she considers manly, like any southern gentleman should be an expert in - independence, unwavering loyalty, honesty and honor, utmost respect for women, chivalry, fatherly qualities, decisive, stuff like that.

Japanese guys tend to be effeminate, clingy, and immature. And in general, they really don't know how to make a woman happy - they're mama's boys.

You won't read this in any book, but she said that Japanese men still subscribe to the Samurai way of treating women, as compared to the European knight; it's alright to love your wife and defend her honor, but you're above her and you shouldn't show too much love.

Her words, not mine

TomoyaIchigo 01-19-2009 07:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keaton421 (Post 666303)
That's painfully obvious.

You're comparing comic books and reality. That's your first problem.

And it's mata ne :)

Like I asked... is reality always bitter? I dun think so... I have seen such guy n girl outside... but ya... obviously it's rare... but I was jux wondering if they r common in Japan...

Plus, hey you know what? Literature and Noval (or even manga) reflects the real culture of the writer's native country.

And about that "mata ne", I will take note for now... but most translation books and subtitles (even in google translate) show "matta ne". Anyway, thx for you care.


Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronin4hire (Post 666304)

Also... how is Singapore culture?

Maybe I'd consider the Japanese way more "normal" and the Singapore way "messed up"?

Haha.. ya... totally agree... Singapore is not jux messed up... they are buying love with money... girls think guy as bank... and loving a normal guy, they feel like investing in a sure losing market... poor guys...

Anyway.. I'm not Singaporean also... I jux live here... :mtongue:

Nyororin 01-19-2009 07:11 AM

All girls do not want the same thing, so it is a bit silly to say that guys don`t know what girls want. It`s ALWAYS going to be hit or miss, both ways. Some people are better at hitting - some miss a lot. That`s life.

I think it`s also very true that most people don`t really know what they want - they just expect their partner to figure it out magically.

ETA;
It is mata ne, not matta ne. Unless you want to say "You waited, didn`t you?" - which is what using matta would imply.
If it`s written by someone as matta - then they`re wrong.


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