Hugging in Japan
 

Okay, so I know hugging isn't really a thing in Japan-- but has that changed in recent years?


When I left my host family (extremely emotional) I hugged my whole family... Probably because they knew it was the American thing to do-- but I swear to God they enjoyed it and wish they could hug all the time. :mtongue: The hugging was then followed by tears and endless waves/bowing.

Anyone have any experience hugging the Japanese? :vsign:

The Japanese I know here follow the saying "when in rome, do as the romans", expect, it's not rome, it's France. So yeah, I've hugged and kissed (one on each cheek) all my Japanese friends. They don't seem to mind it, and some of them even like it and say it makes them feel Chic, and French. Whatever that means :cool:

I always hugged my female friends there and my really close male friends too when I left. I think they want to be closer to others, but society rules don't approve of it. It is changing I think.

I took a group of high school students to Japan a few years ago for a 2 week exchange. On the final day we had a going-away party with our host families (at school) and then we were going to say goodbye to the whole school in typical ceremonial style the next morning. At the going away party there were many tears and much hugging. The next morning the school principal pulled me into his office and told me Japanese don't hug, and what he witnessed essentially looked like an orgy to him (not his words, but basically). He said if we ever wanted to do an exchange with them again, that there would be no further physical contact between our respective students. He was livid and I was in shock.

We never did an exchange with them again, not because of this incident, but because of declining numbers the school shut down (it was combined with another school that had another exchange program in progress), but it was one of the strangest experiences I ever had.

Do you think this is how most of them would see hugging or is it just him?

The English teachers I worked with there were surprised he felt this way, so I would say it is just him. I have met Japanese school principals and vice-principals, and in my experience they tend to be conservative and crochety.

Hugging isn't as popular in Japan as it is in the west - especially amongst adults who aren't in some sort of relationship.

I'll hug my Japanese friends in Canada but I'd never consider hugging my Japanese friends or relatives in Japan. Maybe a handshake at most.

well of course. my experience tells me its a job requirement.

Nice to see some things are universal :D

I think it depends on the person, and probably the age as well. When my friends and I went to the MAM store in Harajuku, we thought the shopkeepers were absolutely adorable, and we hugged them when we were leaving. They didn't seem to mind (of course, we also bought their stuff), but I doubt you'd get much more than a weird look if you went up to someone on the street and asked for a hug, haha.

If you know them, it's probably not a big deal. Especially in terms of 'goodbye's and whatnot--it's a very emotional time. So you should be okay. :)

Well good thing our "hug orgy" was at the train station and not in clear view of the principal (Who was also crochety)

You hugged the shopkeeper? That would be weird in America.

Maybe they "didn't seem to mind" but it is certainly is not part of their culture...just like my dad "doesn't mind" bowing to Japanese people, but it is not in his cultural vocabulary.

If you went up to random people in the street and asked for hugs you would get weird looks ANYWHERE, but ESPECIALLY in Japan.

Oh, yes...the cosplay free huggers...

that explains it all!!! lol
i wouldnt mind getting a hug from them ^.~ *wink wink*

me niether*wink and gives kenpachi a hi five*

I'd hold a sign that said, "Free Steaks", and then pull a big grill out of my back pocket and start the coals.

I was about to say something but that picture may have answered my question, I'm not sure. I don't watch much anime just every so often, but my brother does and shows me a lot of stuff when we're bored and there seems to be lots of hugging involved. Is it still popular within couples? I thought it may be an anime lovers thing because of the free hug cosplayers.

But anyways I like hugs, so if it was discouraged in relationships that'd seem really strange to me if I was in a relationship with someone who comes from a culture that doesn't even do hugging in relationships.

What question could that picture possibly have answered?

I wouldn't be able to survive if I couldn't hug people haha. CUs I like glomp them if they're sad or something so they'll laugh...I'm a very hyper person at school...even if I don't like hugs XD

Because I thought it could mean that people that are into anime quite might like the idea of hugs more because you see it a lot in anime.

Though you don't see much public display of affection, I never got the idea that hugging wasn't okay. I got a few going away hugs from acquaintances, including bar tenders when I left. I thought it was odd, but that is because I only hug my family members and SO.

The Free Hugs Campaign is an international phenomenon, but is also often used by cosplayers and convention goers as a symbol of otaku solidarity.

There's a lot of non cosplayers doing it now too. You often see a few huggers at the Hachiko exit of Shibuya. This is what they get up to YouTube - Free Hugs - Shibuya Tokyo - another True Story

Me, I'm definitely a hugger! I've never had a problem getting hugs from people here. MMM your experience sounds bizarre - I can totally understand you were in shock! What a strange thing to say. I'm a firm believer that physical contact is a necessary part of life!

I asked my Japanese friend (20s) if she liked hugs, and she replied yes.

"So you could give your father a hug?"

She made a gagging sound and said "No way! I would probably scream or throw up."

It is easy to say "I like hugs" but next time ask a Japanese person if they do or could hug their parents or siblings and see what kind of answers you get.

Wow, that puts everything into perspective.

So does that mean she/they wouldn't hug their friends?

The reality is probably "no"...Japanese to Japanese.

My experiences are in line with most on here. Hugging is unnatural to most Japanese.

Though when one of my friends was about to go home he hugged everyone including his Japanese friends and it was all very sad and emotional (because he was going home).

I hug my Mother in Law every time I see here in Hadano...

I feel this YouTube video is in order....





YouTube - FREE HUGS in JAPAN -(Christmas 2008)

It doesn't contradict anything anyone has already said.

I am from Europe and we hug alot.

My ex is from China and when she visited her mother in China she did not even hug her at the airport??? I was shocked. I was kind of upset and asked her why she didnt hug her. I did not understand how you cannot hug your mother after not seeing her for a year or two.

But I always hug my loved ones or the people I care about no matter what. I never received any complaints.

Actually asian girls loved to be hugged. Just from my personal experience.

I know man, I was just throwing that out there.


Just...


Keepin' the convo alive.

That's the cultural difference. We shouldn't let those kids of differences upset us, though. (Sometimes it is difficult.)