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Well Jason I can actually understand where you are coming from with this one. First I should tell you a little about myself. I'm 22, I went straight into a demanding career right after I graduated from college, and the last real relationship I've been in was roughly 3 years ago. Now with that said I should also tell you that I am very happy with my life right now. Dude you're only 23, you gotta get out of this relationship. Now usually I give people who "dream of moving to Japan" a hard time, but your situation is a little different. But not much different don't be a chump you really just don't want to be where you are. "From skiing to beaches?" bro you really just want to go anywhere. As a rule I would probably say visit Japan first, and honestly try to get as much information on the culture and customs there as possible, but you have to think if Japan is really going to be a right fit for you, or if you're just throwing darts at a map. But you have to decide what YOU want out of life. Success is going to require some sacrifice at some point, and believe me it's easier to just get it out of the way at the beginning. If you don't want to begin your life with a family you gotta break that off. Listen there are literally BILLIONS of women in this world, with a new one turning legal everyday, so women aren't going anywhere, but you only get one life.
So here's your game plan; Sit down and think long and hard about what you want (not wanting to be in a relationship doesn't mean that you should move to Japan), Now if you somehow still believe that you want to visit Japan gather a lot more information on Japan, reading more manga doesn't count, I mean actual research (the customs, culture, people, weather, ideology) find a good Japanese instructor, take a look into the JET program (or if your Japanese is good enough by then apply for an office job), then run like Forest Gump, and if you share a computer with her DELETE THE HISTORY (you'd be surprised at how often women go through the history). The real beauty in this plan is that it's not going to happen over night, so that gives you time to really see what is most important to you. Just don't let her see it coming, or it might back fire. |
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disfunkd,
I can see where you're coming from. I dumped my last girlfriend of 3 years so that I could move across the country to live amongst the mountains. In retrospect, it was a great decision. I may be single but I'm probably the happiest single guy around. ;) However, in my case, I did a ton of research instead of following my heart. I visited my future town twice and even spent a month living there as I talked to many of the locals and transients. You're still young and I encourage you to do what's best for you. Don't settle down if you're not ready to do so. But at the same time, do your research! Japan is a mystical country which attracts a lot of people for various reasons but it does have its share of negatives as well! Going to Japan because of your interest in anime, cars, music, etc. is like chasing a girl for the tattoo's on her back. Check out some other forums as well - gaijinpot.com is the central hub for foreigners living in Japan. You can check out that site but be prepared. Those guys are a lot less forgiving than the users on this site. |
Since I am probably older than most of you, a bit of wisdom. You only regret what you DON'T DO.
I have done many crazy things and if I died today I couldn't never say my life was boring. But looking back on the things I didn't do, either because I was afraid, nervous, or because I thought I might disappoint someone else, are the things I look back on and regret. Dump your woman, quit your job and move to Japan. Even if it doesn't work out you still will sleep better at night knowing you tried. Good luck. |
Seems to me you want to break off your relationship so you can bone Japanese women based on your comments about wanting to move there because you think they are the most beautiful women. Hate to tell you this but you aren't going to get any AV type girls there. There are lots of ugly Japanese girls too.
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'Cause you are. OP, You're a natural Jack Kerouac aren't ya'? I respect that a lot. I try to do the same thing myself, seeking the next thrill in life that it has to offer. Can't exactly say much about your situation, but it happens: I've known lots of people who wake up, roll over and look at the person they've loved and slept with in the same bed, and not feel a thing for them anymore. Like someone else suggested, I'd looking into learning a spot of Japanese before you even think twice about heading over there; you'll need the basics, bare minimum, to survive over there. Salute. |
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