Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 (Post 637676)

I'm a Malaysian working in Shanghai. I met with a J-guy nearly a year ago during a tour trip in Xi'An. We had a great one day trip together and exchanged contact. We have been keeping in touch through emails and msn on and off since then. We went for another trip in China with one of my friend in August. I went for a tour trip in Japan in Sep and he's a great host, brought me to the places I want to visit and finish work earlier than usual during weekdays to meet up for dinner. Last month, we went to Beijing together for a short trip and we also meet up when he's on business trip to Shanghai.

I am so very confused now whether he just treat me as a friend or travel mate or what? I think I like him since it's quite comfortable to be with him and he's very gentlemen. When I express that I'm having great trips with him, he too replies the same and wish to travel with me again. The thing is, he never really say anything which I can conclude as he likes me. He's very caring and I think able to remember the things I said and what I likes. But I really don't know if that's due to his good nature and politeness or I mean something special to him.

Anyone here who are from Japan or understand Japan culture well, please help! Could he have hinted anything while I still don't get it? I don't quite know how he interact with people daily to assess whether he's treating me somewhat special or just like a normal friend.

We're going for a trip to Vietnam end of this month. If he's probably just treating me as a normal friend, I should adjust myself and stop putting any hope that we might progress further. After all, he's a nice travel mate to go out with.

Really need help here as I'm getting more frustrated and confused as days past if I don't know where I should place myself. Thanks in advanced.

By the way, he's in his early thirties and I'm in my late tweenties.

Originally Posted by GENERAL (Post 637772)

dear sister .. i wish you happines in your life

ummmm .. it is lovely to find some one to care of us .. but it is hard if we didn't conclude that in perfect way ..

as you are girl you r emotional creature .. wanting for love .. however man usually want sex more than love .. and when he got it he may find another girl to fulifil his emotional & sexual needs .. just as an animal ..

so .. why didn't you tell him about your question directly & looking to his eyes & respondes .. no shame in that .. it is may difficult to ask directly but that conclude it soon ..

ask him also about marriage & his life styles .. you may found another girl during his speech and so you will know your position ..

briefly .. if you have problem with someone however it is kind .. ask him no aothers ..

Originally Posted by SHAD0W (Post 637773)

Sorry i kinda cut in half way in the conversation and only got the jist of your first post. A serious long distance relationship at your age could be pretty difficult. I know I'd find it hard if my girlfriend lived in the next country and we are both only 21 years old.

You should really think about the implications of this before you find out about how he really feels :)

Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 (Post 637778)

I know that, and I think both of us are old enough to overcome such barriers if the relationship is confirmed. However, if this is not confirmed, I'll just have to plan the next steps of my life without him. Therefore, how things going towards between us could really affect what I decide to do next and where I would be going to. For me, one year is long enough to decide if you like the person or not, even though you may need more time to see if the person is suitable to be your life partner or not. For me, without even proceeding to gf/bf, it would be hard to think about anything further as I believe many of the decisions need to be decided by both parties together

Originally Posted by Kaoru1981 (Post 637774)

I do think he's kind of different as nothing happened between us though we had spent nights in the same room during our trips...

I had asked him in msn about the type of girls he liked long time ago, although his answer made me think...hmmm, isn't the person he described sounds like myself? :D

Originally Posted by SHAD0W (Post 637784)

In that case, why don't you do as I said and go in for the kiss, let him decide wether hes going to be in your life plan or not.

Originally Posted by GENERAL (Post 637791)

what a shame cheap way .. kissing is only in movies .. real is differ

Originally Posted by yuujirou (Post 637793)

haha.... not really x]
depends who you're with

but yeah.... kissing is a fun way to start a romantic relationship
>.>

Originally Posted by GENERAL (Post 637800)

kissing is just way to deliver sexual hormones .. but it can't asure you a real love

ih