men intimidated by really pretty girls
 

ok i found this discussion on another forum and i thought it would be interesting to see the views of people here!

this is for the boys mostly but i have noticed alot aswell, that guys are alot more relaxed around girls who could be considered as more average to not good looking then girls who are totally hot. (and im not doing that beauty is in the eye of the beholder stuff im talking about those people who are just plain hot and not and would be considred that way in any race etc)

is that coz guys find pretty girls intimidating? i mean ive noticed so many hot guys with girls who are really not that pretty and ive noticed girls who are smoking saying that they never get approached by hot guys at all! i find that shocking! and ive experienced that alot aswell, i mean some of my friends are gorgeous and struggle to find a hot guy whereas some real mingers go around with daniel henney look alikes! whats up with that guys!!

Yeah.. that might be true for some guys.

For me though... Nobody is too hot.

If you look like you belong on the cover of a magazine then you're trying too hard to look hot and if you're trying too hard to look hot then you give off the impression of being shallow or stuck up.

I think when girls think a guys hot and they can do the whole cute, shy but foreword approach (usually with a friend for some strange reason)

but a guy cant really do a similiar approach as it looks pretty perverted and strange haha

but personally I tend to think "being pretty is easy, being beautiful is hard" and because of that I don't really get intimidated by hot girls...if I were too talk to a girl I fancied though and wasnt familiar with, I would most deffinitly feel insecure about saying the wrong thing and so on, which in turn would make me feel slightly intimidated.

Girls' idea of "hot" and guys' idea of it are often very different...

And after all, people don't just care about the looks.

The only way a pretty girl could intimidate me is if she were running towards me with a machete in hand.

...If I find the girl very attractive, then perhaps I'd be a bit self-conscience -- out of my comfort zone, maybe.

I like people watching in bars because you get to see this kind of thing at play. I've seen really beautiful girls being passed over for more ordinary looking women simply because they're unintentionally putting out the wrong body-language. Too needy, or too insecure for example. Or too blatantly carrying baggage.
One of my friends, if taken from a photograph is average. Nothing to write home about. But in person, the sheer force of her personality has men flocking at her in droves. Charm is the key. You can be devastatingly beautiful, but it's useless if you've got a mouth like a drunk trucker and a sour, selfish personality.

First things in my mind when I see a real stunning girl, "she must be taken", "she is to beautiful to be single". Most people think this way, at least in my area.

And therein lay the problem. Or lack of. In my experience,the pretty girls are frequently the most lonley. why? because people tend to all think exactly that:'She must be taken cause she's pretty.' Because everyone tends to think alike(Yay for primal pack mentality!) the end result is a lot of guys walking right by and leaving the pretty girl all alone. I personally can't really talk I suppose,as I one day decided to break the trend,stop and talk to the pretty girl. Made a complete idiot of myself in the process. Fell off my chair. Twice. A week later,I think i'm the luckiest guy on earth.

Six months later,I know i'm the luckiest.

Love you Kyoko :rheart:

I have to say that, in England I never see guys having trouble talking to or dating hot, sexy girls and I don't see those girls being beat out by some mousey 'Betty Jane.' But then, English girls are the cutest in the world. :mtongue: I do know that guys have told me that they often think certain strata of girls are 'out of their league.' I also know that 'ordinary' looking girls are often intimidated by the handsome 'hunks' around. I think its just a matter of self esteem more than anyone being intimidated. A 'plane' girl with total self confidence will approach and win over a hot guy and the reverse can be true. But most Westerners have grown up with a totally false set of values in beauty from the advertisement industry and that in itself is a shame if not a crime.

Oh Kuran, that is so sweet. I love you to boy. :rheart:

Are you dating KyokoUK?

Indeed. Note the little love notes at the bottom of both posts :)

Oh yes, Kuran and I are indeed dating but long distance now since he went to the US to study business. Once he graduates though, we will be together again. Thank you for asking :)

Forgot to say, second thing in my mind, "I don't care, I'll give it a try.". Needless to say, it actually worked, I've been with Anya from 13 to 20 years old, thats when I think God found out an Angel was missing, and called her back. I know she's guarding me every step I make, but still, it hurts so deep.

I certainly understand your feelings and that is a lovely visualization you have of it. I will just have to be my KuronUSA's angel in life and when the Buddah-stream of life-death-rebirth carry us away we will just work to find one another again. If we found each other this time around then we surly can on the next go. :rheart:

im glad to see another view on this! seems like im not the only one who thinks that way!

my problem and point exactly! thats exactly what im trying to get at! ive noticed it so much its not even funny! guys need to understand the pretty girls are human just like other girls and DONT have high standards 99.9% of the time!

im glad that u broke from tradition and actually decided to approach a hot girl (pats back) about bloody time!

:) Thanks,I certainly did find the perfect girl.Very hot indeed.


I don't really set much stock in tradition,all it means is that people have done it for multiple generations. That by no means that it's pratical,ethical,etc.

This is very true.
I'd like to add to your post. I've known a couple of extremely pretty girls who fancied themselves as being just that. This is a serious repellent for most men. Not all pretty girls are like that, but a few examples like them can cause a ripple effect.

Additionally, I've read in psychology books that most people tend to date people of similar "attractive" levels. As BS as this sounds, I've done nothing but see it around me so I can't completely dispel it. So, if you happen to be unreasonably pretty...good luck finding a reasonably pretty man. (Handsome would have been more apt, I'd guess) :P

I think it's retarded how you've got this paradigm of thought which seperates womenfolk into "pretty" and "other" and how you seem to think that this is the only factor which men use to decide whether they have a suitable partner.

Being "pretty" in that sense is an advantage in a club or a bar. In everyday life though there are so many more things that come into play not to mention that you don't have to be a magazine covergirl to be considered pretty by men.

from a not very pretty old lady--------

surely beauty is in the eye of the beholder-- one mans meat is another mans poison.

Its the person inside the outer shell that matters. anyone can dress up, put on fancy clothes and hairstyles-------------

BUT---Pretty doesn't really mean a lot.

I have three older grand-daughters-- who I consider beautiful--but they do like to dress up when they go clubbing etc.

use hair extensions, colour their hair and wear attractive clothes. They always seem to have plenty of boyfriends-- but apart from the eldest who is 23-- they are pretty self sufficient.


I suppose if they want a great night out dancing etc they want to look attractive.

I wouldn't say any of them are PRETTY-- but they are attractive and have a lovely nature. The eldest works for Easy Jet-- so meets many people from around the world.


I think that some "Professional "WOmen" can be very scary or intimidating.

Those that work for big companies-- or run organisations etc. can be very intimidating

Yes since I do not talk to ereally pretty girls and they do not yak to me either

its not just me who thinks that way, im sure u dont like every woman u meet? so what about the ones ur not attracted to, what would u call them? (i guess i shud have put it better as - women who the majority of people would find attractive and women who the majority of people wodnt find that attractive PHYSICALLY) i wasnt being politically correct enough. secondly the reason i was asking if are people intimidated by those kind of 'pretty' girls (based soley on looks) is coz the first thing u see about a person litrally is how they look whether u wanna judge on that or not and then afterwards u would get to know them, but everyone makes some judgements on appearence when they first meet a person even if its just does this person look approachable or not not necessarily pretty

'' you don't have to be a magazine covergirl to be considered pretty by men''

ino that thats why i sed (no beauty is in the eye of the beholder stuff here when i first started this thread) coz i know everyone has their own views on whats 'pretty' i was going on majorities.

I'll talk to any girl, it doesn't matter how pretty they are physically, I think the whole "she's out of my league" thing is just a lack of self confidence, not for me though, a woman is a woman, their just packaged differently. :vsign:

i find that when im around a guy i find hurtfully good looking i start to go the complete opposite and become loud and funny, but its only to cover up my nervousness! and i also assume that they have a girlfriend and or very high standards so puts me off quite a bit in talking to them directly.

but your all right confidence is the key! :D

LOL!!!! I'm not really sure how to break this to you, but there are MANY different kinds of women. You can't just say 'women are women but with different packaging' cause that's really not how it goes. Women are VERY different..

VERY VERY TRUE

You didn't really get the meaning of "woman is a woman"... It doesn't refer that there isn't diversity in style, thinking and anything else.
It was about that women have the natural need for love from someone, at least at one moment in they're life, just like the other half, it's part of the human nature. That means that boy "Y" has a slight chance to be the lucky guy to meet girl "X" (regardless of social imposed standards) and to make her smile for the rest of her life.

jessica alba
 

ok dont know how relevant ppl will find this, but i think it proved a point, today was reading jessica alba's interview and she was asked do men ask you out alot and she said 'no i never get asked out, ive always had a problem with that' now if a woman whose considered to be one of the worlds most beautiful has a problem, must be some truth to the theory??

hmmm
 

hmmm, in my experience i find the same thing to be true about good looking, men, they are really arrogant and think that their too good for anyone, (and usually in the end 99.9% of them end up with total mingers anyway) but, i hate people like that, humbleness is key*

Oh my god...
For once...I have to agree with you.
I mean seriously....You got me LOLing in real life.

wow i already answered your stupidity in the other thread ronin, so im not even going to bother here (sighs...facepalm)

I think it's depend on the situation...

in large group most likely there will be higher intimidate percentage. because the man will start to wonder (alot) if it's OK to take the risk of talking with this girl and what are the percentage that he will not say something stupid\get burned\get reject in front of large audience.
In smaller groups\1on1 the man will think that the percentage of being humiliate will be reduce and it will be just between them -"no one see , no one should know".

tbh if you know the girl (how she act, social group ect.) you can "adjust" yourself in the beginning...but give a spark of your own true colors , cause if not it's not worth it, inside you will be the same squishy man as you were before.

hmmm its just that in experience ive seen that if a girl is quite good looking, they hardly ever get asked out, and i dont think it has anything to do with the personality bcoz u find that out after u talk to the person, but initially guys dont even approach such girls, then complain that good looking women only go out with minging men! i think reading the jessica alba interview cemented my belief in this

Jessica Alba: I never get asked out | Metro.co.uk
HERES THE INTERVIEW

btw i think that all the men here have at some point shown they would have a little reserve in apporaching a beautiful woman...:)

and i must also mention that as a result of the lack of attention ive seen that alot of beautiful women arent really that confident, (ofcourse there are some women who are stuck up but alot of them arent most of the time) i think we tend to prejudge that if certain people look a certain way they will have a certain type of personality

btw a question for the GUYS if you really like a girl would there ever be sometimes when u would just never make a move regardless of how much u liked her? and if so when

While it is an exaggeration, the point is well taken. To make someone laugh requires connecting with them on an intellectual level in a positive way. Once you have that, they are going to be far more open and accepting of you than if it was only a superficial exchange.

i agree that i love it when a man can make u laugh thats like plus 98 outta 100 for them and the other 2 points they get if theyre hot and have a good personality

I wonder where u get that experience... Is it cause it happened to you? (as in.. are you the beautiful chick?) or is it because you WATCHED it go down? Or HEARD that it went down? O_Ô I'm just wondering..

A bit intimidated when you like someone and want her to be your friend (or more than that).

As for talking to general chicks, no intimidation at all. Actually they fuel me to talk to them more.