Quote:
Originally Posted by Columbine
As for Japan, I've seen sex how-to's in magazine aimed at teen girls, so I'd say there's less of an issue about pre-marital sex based on that alone. I doubt many parents actively WANT their offspring sleeping around like billy-o, but promiscuity is a slightly different issue to simply having sex before marriage.
|
I think you`ve made a really important point here. Sex before marriage is not promiscuity. Japanese attitudes toward promiscuity aren`t positive (are they anywhere?), but attitudes toward sex-before-marriage are quite neutral. I` d even dare to say positive. It is completely expected, and without religious stigma attached there doesn`t seem to be anything
against it. Just the potential results, so be careful sort of thing.
Parents seem to talk to their children about not getting (or getting someone) pregnant and focusing on studies... Not about abstinence. I`ve heard countless tales of parents turning a blind eye to a child having a boyfriend/girlfriend over "in the bedroom" - and even of parents conveniently "going out shopping for a few hours" when one comes over.
However, I think parents are just as judgmental about their child`s boyfriends/girlfriends. If they don`t approve, you can bet that they`ll make it very very hard to meet up.
As a side note - one of my friends in school had been informally betrothed to the son of a family friend. They had grown up knowing this, were good friends, and were both accepting of getting married after graduation.
Both of them were encouraged to "enjoy themselves" while still in school by parents. She had a boyfriend and he had a girlfriend - and everyone knew that they were pretty much guaranteed to get married in a couple years.
They got married as planned by family (I imagine if either had strongly rejected the idea they definitely wouldn`t have been forced), and a few months ago I got a card from her announcing the birth of their third baby.
If there were a lot of stigma attached to holding onto virginity until marriage, I find it hard to imagine being encouraged to have other relationships beforehand.