Child Adoption
 

The first thread on this subject, YEY!
Anyways, I plan on living in Japan...
But I don't ever actually plan on having a kid....
But I do want to adopt...
So when I'm like 25 or something I want to adopt a little Japanese girl..
We'll probably get a lot of weird looks cause I don't have any Asian in me whatsoever, I'm a white girl
But I don't care, I'll still love her ^^
*discuss*

sounds like a good idea to me.. congrats on future j-motherhood!

xD
 

lol Thank you... I guess... ^^

sorry for the short response i just dont know too much about adopting or motherhood sooo ummm.. uhh.. all i know to say is congrats... Im sure it wont look funny I think it would be rather cute to see ...

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Yeah, I understand
I just don't like babies, which is why I'm not going to have one and adopt one that's at least 4.
I can't wait *dance dance dance*

ha ha yeah i knwo what you mean i hate the squaking messes... i dont see what everyone is so excited about... i mean the weay i see it is you get fat, gross, and mean for 9 months and then you basically squirt out this little being that isnt good for anything but smelling everything up and eating all youra food and money up till it gets old enough to travel and you are a bad parent for letting it hang out with the wrong pooping squirting beings.. i dunno just doesnt sound like the same thing society teaches on babyknowledge.

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Uh... yeah ^^
I just don't like defecation, makes me puke
Therefore, me having a baby, not the best idea
And I hate puke
And crying
They cry all the time! ><

And to insert some reality into this thread....
Japan doesn`t have an adoption policy. Meaning there aren`t a whole lot of Japanese girls up for adoption *in* Japan, to Japanese parents... Let alone to those in other countries.

I would suggest China or Korea. I highly doubt you`ll ever be able to adopt from Japan.

I know! I hate that screaming they do .. i swear there is a certain pitch they use to make me go insane... makes me want to shoot myself rather than hear it.. it's terrible. I would lov eto be a parent just dont want the first few useless years is all... but alas I fear I may need to endure if my wife has her way... not soon though... I HOPE *crosses fingers*

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... thanks for crushing my dreams. lol
If I can't get a Japanese girl, then I'll just go to China and adopt one and then bring her to Japan! ><
IT WILL WORK!
I am a very persuasive person, it will work! ><
EDIT: Why do so many women like babies, I don't get it.

ha ha ! you seem like the type to one way or another get one from Japan dont let your dreams go so easily h aha!

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I am so desperate I will talk my way into getting someone to get pregnant for me and then adopt their kid. lol

lol that IS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE... lol sounds a lil sitcomish though. ha ha

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... so?
I want a little Japanese girl, I have a name picked out and everything.

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Sachiko ^^
Means "child of bliss"

Women like babies because in reality, most babies don`t spend that much time screaming. They spend most of their time snuggling up against you and watching you in awe as if you were a god.

Of course, that`s only if you know how to take care of a baby properly.

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I practically raised my sister
She did that quiet and adoring thing for the first few months
But then her human instinct to want constantly kicked in
And she was never quiet

which i dont... so yeah alll screeaming with me. its sad and makes me depressed and frusterated after 10 min... im a man thgat likes his solitude.. i guess when my wifey has one i will have to find somewhere sound proof to lock myself away for awhile so i dont go bereserk....

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Me too... I like quiet
Unless they're laughing loudly, which I don't mind
But the screaming and crying, I can't deal with
I can deal with whining though, which is why I've opted for around 3 or 4
Which is around the time they start whining more and crying less

lol and they are actually cute about that time.. lol im at work right now and this asian couple just came in and had their little girl around 5 or 6 with them she was spinning and what not then she saw me and i smiled at hee.. lol she smiled back and then ran off to hide behin d her parents legs./.. ha ha she was way cute!

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Awwww, how cute!
I can't wait...
Just.... 6 more years until Japan...
So about 7 years until I get a little girl...
Awwww. *shaking cause I'm so EXCITED*

Umm, what is to say she won`t know how to take care of a baby?

And really, you`re not going to get a wife if you plan on abandoning her to take care of the kid. I really feel sorry for any kids in your future if you`re just going to ignore them.

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Oh my god, you just made me about cry my eyes out laughing.
You really have never been around kids that much, have you?

3 and 4? That is the PEAK for whining, screaming, and general fits. You know all those kids who throw themselves down in stores screaming for toys? Well, that is NORMAL for a 3, 4, and 5 year old. The only reason parents can get through those years is by remembering how quiet, gentle, and sweet the baby was at 0, 1, and 2.

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Sorry, I've tried to ignore this but now I have to say something
Why do you keep on saying nasty things?
Not everyone is meant for raising babies
You have to have a certain type of personality to deal with them, and not everyone has it
It's not their fault
He didn't say that he'd ignore them
But it's better for him to go off alone, then go berserk infront of his kids
And I think he said he already was married, and I'm sure they'll come up to some sort of agreement on how to deal with their own kids, whenever they decide to have them
Everyoen has different experiences with kids because not all kids are the same
I've raised my sister and she hardly ever cries or screams
It was when she was a baby and a toddler
And I'd never want to deal with Terrible 2's because of their teething
Just stop badmouthing people about how they'd raise their IMAGINARY kids, no one's perfect

Agreed and yes I AM already married and we WILL make our own decisions on kids so although your input has been sooooooooo helpfull id rather not hear you post your "lil' bit of reality".
btw thank you uxintatei for the back upp

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You're welcome
I just had to say something ^^

but anyway.. ha ha back to happy thoughts....


I have always thought of adopting a lil' asian girl. Even before I wanted to go to Japan ... I love how cute they are they have these big eyes and shy lil' smiles its great! ha ha! More and more I think of getting a boy though too.. i dunno at any rate it wont bee tooo incredibly soon I have too much expenses and things to get in order before i can handle a kid.

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Yeah, they are adorable...
I'm going to do her hair everyday
And make it looks like Bou's, off of Antic Cafe's, hair
I love that hairstyle and it looks even more adorable on little girls ^^

I`m not meaning to say nasty things.

What I am trying to do, however, is to put things in perspective. Not everyone on here is married, and not everyone on here has children. In fact, I would say the majority of people on this board are teenagers, not even close to having children.

Why am I bothering? Because I am married, and I do have children, and I am currently fighting for adoption rights for a child in Japan because I can`t have any more. I have invited 5 people in the last 30 minutes out of my friends (raising children in Japan) who would like to have a place to discuss such things - as this category is intended for - who are wane to even join JF because "everyone is a kid" and "we don`t want a bunch of kids filling our topics with fantasy about Japanese babies", etc.

Which is what this topic is. Fantasy. I thought this category was meant to be about REAL parenting in Japan. If it`s roleplaying as a parent of a cute little Japanese girl, shouldn`t it be in that topic?

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I posted this thread to get POLITE feedback on what it's like on raising a child in Japan
You are not polite
If you don't like what we're talking about, then you don't need to read it
And if your friends did post a thread on their subject and wanted to talk to other Japanese parents, I wouldn't post because I am not that
I am trying to get educated on everything so my switch from America to Japan will be as smooth as possible
But you are rude and I do not appreciate that

I`m sorry, but I have not said anything that I believed was rude at all.
This is the way I always write. I apologize if that seems rude to you. It`s just my writing style. In fact, I thought I was being very light in tone.

I usually just try to add facts to discussions. It is a fact that Japanese children are not up for adoption in Japan, let alone outside Japan. It is a fact that babies do not scream all the time. It is also a fact that the worst screaming and fits happen between 3 and 5.
I`m sorry if those facts aren`t convenient for you, but that`s life.

Like I said, every child is different, therefore so are people's experiences
I would not like a child that is 2 and under, because of the diapers, teething, crying, and screaming
My experience is that children that are 4 and above, are to mostly whine then anything else, which I can handle
They are also capable of comprehending discipline and manners better than a child of 2 and under.

It isnt about the facts the facts are helpful its the demeaning tone that has nothing to do with your "writing style" You need to chill this is getting out of hand and your derogitory comments are more than a little mean... you can preach your belief on children and life all you want just do it in a way that isnt rude

Agreed
Now, meditation time! ^^

*breathes deeply* ok so back to Japanese children..

Have you ever given thought to what kind of school you will send your adopted child to or what city in Japan you will live in?

I understand what you are saying... What I am trying to explain is that a lot of that is a misperception. I`m not simply speaking from experience with my own child. (Who is 2, and would be considered an exception anyway because he`s not at all normal to begin with.)
What I am speaking from is my experience as a child developmental specialist. Keeping misperceptions about what is normal with a child only causes problems later on when things don`t (naturally) go as you would expect.

And that`s not even mentioning the incredibly large number of problems inherent to adoption after a certain age.

Either way - and I don`t mean this is a rude way - but what does your dream of adopting a Japanese child have to do with actually parenting in Japan? If you were *asking* about parenting in Japan, that would be one thing. But you`re just telling everyone about your dream... Which is fine and all, but it has nothing to do with actually raising a child in Japan.

I would like to live in Osaka
And when the time comes, I'll research on the schools there to make sure I pick the best one
I want to know the child first before I decide what school to put her in
And if I'm with anybody it will also be their decision
EDIT: I've told people what I want to do, which is adopt a Japanese girl, so I could get information on the schools, good towns and cities that are child friendly, things like that.

Yeah that is true you need to have a feel for what your life is like beofre you can make those big decisions i guess...

BTW: I like the choiuce for the name though very meaningful and pretty.

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Yep.
And thank you.
A good friend of mine was named that and I'd like to name my child that in her honor, I didn't know what it meant until I looked it up a few weeks ago.