JapanForum.com

JapanForum.com (https://www.japanforum.com/forum/)
-   English & Other Language Help (https://www.japanforum.com/forum/english-other-language-help/)
-   -   Funny English Mistranslations (https://www.japanforum.com/forum/english-other-language-help/11487-funny-english-mistranslations.html)

Excessum 01-10-2008 08:34 PM

Funny English Mistranslations
 
Ever had grammar problems in your old English class? Felt bad about it? Well, you'll feel better when you read these...


In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbitten to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis.

In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.

In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.

In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.

In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.

In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.

In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.

In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.

In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.

On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.

In a Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service.

Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.

In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.

Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly: There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Aets by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.

In an East African newspaper: A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.

In a Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.

A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.

In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.

In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.

A translated sentence from a Russian chess book: A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played.

In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours -- we guarantee no miscarriages.

Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass?

On the faucet in a Finnish washroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.

In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.

On the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.

Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop: Drive Sideways.

In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream.

In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.

In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.

In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.

At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.

In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.

In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner:
Cooles and Heates:
If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance:
- English well talking.
- Here speeching American.

Source: Esatclear

orewasenshi 01-10-2008 08:44 PM

Captain: What!
Operator: Main screen turn on.
Captain: It's you!!
CATS: How are you gentlemen!!
CATS: All your base are belong to us.
CATS: You are on the way to destruction.
Captain: What you say!!
CATS: You have no chance to survive make your time.

Zero Wing: The Worst Video Game Translation.

MazarDantechildofdevil 01-10-2008 10:28 PM

Those are really funny... All I can say that it's awesome to see how things like that are hilarious... You are invited to take advantage of the Chambermaid... Ya... OKAY! I'll do that!

Signed,
MazarDante

Kloudcat 01-10-2008 10:32 PM

i know a funny website! ^^


Welcome to Engrish.com!

MazarDantechildofdevil 01-11-2008 12:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kloudcat (Post 352251)
i know a funny website! ^^


Welcome to Engrish.com!

lol... Funny stuff there... Funny stuff... ^.^;

Acidreptile 01-11-2008 01:01 AM

That was very funny thanks Count.:vsign:

Amnell 01-11-2008 02:17 AM

I have a character in one of my role-plays who's first language is one that I made up. The language has about three similarities to Japanese, and those are verb placement, agglutinating, and a few honorifics used with interogatives. The rest of the language I borrowed from English and Spanish. Anyway, she makes a lot of errors similar to this one:

"if ever back here they came, we not could to allow them that they have it."

This is definitely my most interesting character ever to date...:rolleyes:

Uruha 01-11-2008 04:06 AM

Holy bejebusss. This just made my day. XD

I literally burst a lung laughing.
That Finnish one about the dripping ownssss~ x3

SailorBratt18 01-11-2008 04:11 AM

haha that DOES make me feel better! Man that was a long list...

noodle 01-11-2008 10:39 PM

haha, these are funny, but luckily none of them are government signs... In algeria, the government sometimes makes spelling and grammar mistakes in french which is rather ridiculous and shameful:mad:

Thunda 01-11-2008 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 352151)
At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

Haha I know that one :D :vsign:
Shame on us

Atheros 01-16-2008 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 352151)
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

A translated sentence from a Russian chess book: A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played.

On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
Source: Esatclear

Dont use online translation and never try to translate russian text word to word =) Even if it seems funny it's only thnx to your translation :P We have tha same result when try to do the same but in English-Russian ^_-

clairebear 01-16-2008 08:11 PM

"On the faucet in a Finnish washroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right."

LOL. :p

Suki 01-16-2008 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 352151)
In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

O.O

xDDDDDDDDDDD!! Omg, that made me laugh my head off...

Some of those mistakes are badly translated expressions. Here in Spain we say (well I don't ^^) 'por si las moscas' which is an expression that means 'just in case', it's amazing how many people translate it into Enlish literally and say 'for if the flies' xD! And they actually think they're making sense... :rolleyes: And there're a couple of expressions used quite often when swearing which would sound extremely funny in English: Véte a freir espárragos --> Go away to fry asparagus and Alucinas pepinillos ---> You hallucinate little cucumbers xDDDDDDDDDDDD!

NightChilde25 01-16-2008 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kloudcat (Post 352251)
i know a funny website! ^^


Welcome to Engrish.com!

This is too funny! I actually have a big table book called Engrish with the same type of stuff. I may try to put some scans up later.

SeeD 01-16-2008 09:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suki (Post 359209)
Alucinas pepinillos ---> You hallucinate little cucumbers xDDDDDDDDDDDD!

hahaahaha good one ;]

Amnell 01-16-2008 09:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suki (Post 359209)
O.O

xDDDDDDDDDDD!! Omg, that made me laugh my head off...

Some of those mistakes are badly translated expressions. Here in Spain we say (well I don't ^^) 'por si las moscas' which is an expression that means 'just in case', it's amazing how many people translate it into Enlish literally and say 'for if the flies' xD! And they actually think they're making sense... :rolleyes: And there're a couple of expressions used quite often when swearing which would sound extremely funny in English: Véte a freir espárragos --> Go away to fry asparagus and Alucinas pepinillos ---> You hallucinate little cucumbers xDDDDDDDDDDDD!

Those aren't unlike some of the idioms we use in English (at least in America).

"I'd like to pick your brain" might sound very strange to a foriegner if translated literally.

Or, "Sure, I'll take a stab at it" might seem a little violent...

Katia 01-18-2008 04:45 AM

Quote:

In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
ahaha I can believe that one, I lived in Australia for the past 7 years, I've never met am intelligent person that was born here xD

And most of those use correct English, except maybe with small errors here and there but overall the majority is just funny, not inaccurate o_O

ciao

Suki 01-19-2008 12:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Katia (Post 360943)
ahaha I can believe that one, I lived in Australia for the past 7 years, I've never met am intelligent person that was born here xD

It says Austrian, not Australian ;) Germanic accents are so funny x)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Amnell
"Sure, I'll take a stab at it" might seem a little violent...

lol Indeed. I nearly died from a heart attack the first time I heard someone shout "hey it's raining cats and dogs", apparently it's somewhat of a British saying xD!

Akoni 01-19-2008 01:17 PM

Wont it be ironic if there was a site elsewhere that had people mocking those who speak english that try to speak in their language? :x

Kuroshiro 01-22-2008 04:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Akoni (Post 362620)
Wont it be ironic if there was a site elsewhere that had people mocking those who speak english that try to speak in their language? :x

I think there are websites like that :P

DragonShade 01-22-2008 04:30 PM

In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

This one is simply genius!

niklo90 01-31-2008 09:17 PM

LOL thats actually halariosu

CrystalTear 02-01-2008 08:00 PM

LMAO XD Really funny

Excessum 02-01-2008 08:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by orewasenshi (Post 352158)
Zero Wing: The Worst Video Game Translation.

Omg... web classics ^^


orewasenshi 02-01-2008 08:26 PM



Holy shit!

I was looking for that video!

Thanks Ex!

Kajitsu 02-10-2008 08:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DragonShade (Post 368299)
In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

This one is simply genius!

No- it's ingenuous!

If I know the word correctly.

Kajitsu 02-26-2008 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kajitsu (Post 394790)
No- it's ingenuous!

If I know the word correctly.

It turns out I didn't know the word correctly. Sorry about that.

Kajitsu 04-09-2008 06:28 PM

Come on! Let's keep this on the front page!

Jaydelart 04-09-2008 06:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 352151)
In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.

----

From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

Those two were hilarious.
Thanks for posting.

Suki 04-09-2008 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 384428)

LMAO~!

All your base/your base/base/base/all your base/are belong to us xDDDDDDDD!

Awesome.

Excessum 04-10-2008 05:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suki (Post 454725)
LMAO~!

All your base/your base/base/base/all your base/are belong to us xDDDDDDDD!

Awesome.

I refuse to believe you haven't heard this stuff before o_O That's like the biggest internet hoax in the 2001-2002 X)

Btw... there's a Nirvana version of this song as well... :D



Suki 04-10-2008 02:42 PM

Ohhh loved it *_*

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 455427)
I refuse to believe you haven't heard this stuff before o_O That's like the biggest internet hoax in the 2001-2002 X)

I had heard other vesions, but it's been a bunch of years so it's funny all over again.

Room service menu in a Chinese hotel:

~ Stuffed fatty meat pork

~ Slobbering chicken

~ Lion head

~ Cheese melting in ham parcel

~ Chicken: the fragrance explodes the cowboy bone O_O'

Therapist advertisement



~ Toilet for a disabled person labelled as: Deformed man toilet

~ What it says on the signs that warn of slippery roads: Beware, the slippery are very crafty xDDD!

~ No noising ROFL!

~ Question authority (information booth xDDD)

~ Drinktea (Mandarin word for 'closed for business')


MMM 04-10-2008 02:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Excessum (Post 455427)
I refuse to believe you haven't heard this stuff before o_O That's like the biggest internet hoax in the 2001-2002 X)

Btw... there's a Nirvana version of this song as well... :D

What hoax? That's the real (and really bad translation) of a game called Zero Wing.

All your base are belong to us - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

NanteNa 04-10-2008 03:06 PM

Ex@ Hahah! XD I luv that one! Cannot believe they actually released that for their campaigne. X'D

Excessum 04-14-2008 10:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MMM (Post 455658)
What hoax? That's the real (and really bad translation) of a game called Zero Wing.


Whooops... my bad... i tend to have a bad choice of wording after extended periods of being awake >_< I was looking for a synonym for a word "joke" and by some delusive reason, "hoax' was the 1st word that came in my mind at that point... sorry 'bout that :rolleyes:

P.S. With this peace of software you can emulate the cyborg-ish voice in that intro (Big robot preset)... and it's freeware :P

ARose 04-15-2008 01:30 AM

At work all the overseas banks send us death notices saying "The customer has passed out" instead of passed away. We laugh everytime we see it. :p

Kyumika 04-15-2008 01:49 AM

Lol that's funny.

Tyrien 04-15-2008 02:07 AM

This site just takes the cake.

Welcome to Engrish.com!

kyo_9 04-15-2008 02:22 AM

haha.. funny funny


All times are GMT. The time now is 07:05 AM.

Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.0.0 RC6