I never said it was all about love. I said it was a form of love. Read more carefully before criticizing. I'm not trying to be mean.

Simply put, a 16-year-old is still developing both physically and mentally, and that is part of the reason why there are laws in effect to protect not-fully mature individuals from adults that would take advantage of them.

You can say love is blind, and knows no age. That is fine, but how many of you here well over the age of 16 are still with the person you loved when you were 16?

As the brain and body mature, things change. Lots of girls regret not waiting until they were at least 18 before giving up their virginity, if only because the boy they thought they loved lost interest after she allowed him to sleep with her.

No matter how you look at it, there is no scenario where an older foreign man sleeping with a 16-year-old Japanese girl is a good idea.

You know, if he really loves the girl, he'd wait for the right time. Now that for me, is true love. He shouldnt ask a question if theres a way he can have sex with this girl in the first place.

I'm 16 and I admit, I had a girlfriend before and we thought that we are made for each other, we even talked about our marriage and future plans. After 1 month our relationship is over. Stupid but true.

What is your future plans with her? I mean, you're probably just going to have a fling, then eventually leave Japan and you're going to leave her behind... and I am yet to meet a girl that doesn't have some kind of mental issue that had sex with an older guy when they were young. And what if you accidentally get her pregnant?

I'd just find someone more closer to your age, its better for her probably down the future.

Well, Lets Not Be Too Quick To Judge, Lust Is Part of Our Nature As Humans. =P But Ya.. Some Decisions Require Us To Think With Our Heads Not Down There.. =)

I have a friend in this current situation (sorta, but lets just say that their friendship has a bit of.....life threatening twist to it).

I'm not going into detail about THEIR story, but my friend, being the older one, though it best to wait until she was at least 18 before doing anything. I think the same applies to this situation. If you really care for her, just wait it out.

LOL @ this.

Funny how fast people forget age differences like this have only recently ( past 80 years tops) been considered taboo compared to the past thousands of years in "civilized" human history. Not to mention, its also a cultural "law" as well, meaning, not the whole planet thinks theres something wrong with a 16 and a 24 year old dating. Opinions on this are as diverse as the religions of the world, everyone knows they are right and thinks anyone who doesn't share their same view is wrong, that, is being closed minded.

So to the original poster, theres a difference between love and lust, make sure you completely understand what you are feeling. And if you're both sure its love, you must abide by the laws of the land you're in. So be with each other and enjoy each others company until you can actually make love.

That's not stupid, that's normal.

You want to know who came up with the whole, "Love has no boundaries," shtick? The people dating 16 year olds.

Love is powerful, love is very strong, and love can last a good long time. Love can reunite people, bring them closer together, and bring out the best in people. And there are all sorts of boundaries that can screw with the aforementioned.

But check this out: Age is not a boundary, it's a difference. If you honestly believe otherwise, I fully expect you to be asking couples or other people in general, "So what's your boundary in age?"

In the 1920s grown men were not encouraged to pursue 16 year old girls. Know what the average age of marriage for women in the US was in 1900? 22. For men it was 25.

So if you want to look back a couple thousand years, yes women were married at 12 and 13, but in a society where the life expectancy is under 40 years old, this makes more sense.

Regardless, it doesn't negate the fact that 16-year-olds are not yet fully mature, physically or emotionally.

When the question is "Should I have sex with a 16 year old girl?" the safe answer is always "No!"

It's quite easy actually. I once met a woman in a night club who turned out to be only 15. It was an over 18 club, and she told me she was 19. I was carded at the club each time I went in, so I assumed she was telling me the truth. Several weeks passed before I finally found out her real age.

Young girls marrying older men dates less than a couple of centuries ago. It was customary for girls, even as young as 12 and 13 to be married to a middle aged man, as he would be experienced enough to take care of her and have a steady income.

Key word there.

Amazing what 200+ years will do to a given culture.

Does that still seem like a good idea to you today?

Whoa whoa guys, I was stating a fact. Did it look like I was trying to make a point? I was just correcting your facts, that's all.

Of course it looked like you were trying to make a point.

I'm just nitpicking as I agree with your sentiment... I mean boundaries have to be set to protect minors in my opinion also.

However in some countries the age of consent is 16 (like here in New Zealand) so I don't think 18 is some magic number nor do I believe 16 year olds are completely unable to make an informed decision on sex.

In saying that though the boundary Japanese society has set is 18 and as a guest to Japan the OP would do well to respect that boundary.

The law is only a part of what I was trying to say.

People can say "age is just a number" but if 16-year-olds are ready for sex, does that mean so are 14-year-olds? 12-year-olds? Do I need to keep going lower?

We KNOW that 16-year-olds are not fully mature individuals, physically and mentally. Research shows the completion of puberty at somewhere between 18 and 21 for the most part.

I will ask again. If you are over the age of 22, tell me honestly if you are still with the girl or boy you "loved" when you were 16. My educated guess would tell me that almost none of those relationships stood the test of time. Why? Because bodies are still changing. The brain is still growing. Hormones are flaring...the whole classic speech.

You can't really go to much lower than 16 in my opinion (I think the lowest I heard about was in Denmark where it's apparently 15).

I hear what you're saying but there is another side to why we have the law at the age it is.

The idea is that while a boundary is needed to protect young girls from predatory men... one is also needed to protect full grown men from "hormone flaring" young girls.

A 16 year old actively seeking sex can appear fully developed and lie about her age to get what she wants.

Very few 14 year olds appear fully developed.

As for my 16 year old love life... Hehe... I dated a girl who I thought I was in love with sure.. but I dated women when I was 19, 24, and 26 who I thought I was in love with too.

Why are my 16 year old feelings not valid yet my 19, 24 and 26 year old ones are?

You are totally correct here. Though with make-up and nice clothes and almost any girl can look 18. The laws are there to protect teens from themselves, too...

Guys instead of encouraging, maybe we should just tell him to stay away from that girl. Because no matter how you look at it, no matter how this 16 year old wants sex, it's just not right and it will never be right to have a relationship with a minor and i'm talking about today not 200 years ago. This is for his safe, because he can be in serious trouble for touching that girl.

And theres a huge difference between a 16 year old and a 19 year old or a 24 or a 26 year old. Because girls think more maturely when their 18 and they can do stupid stuff below that age.

Actually I agreed with MMM when I said that the OP would do well to respect the laws of Japan as well as agree with the idea of a boundary.

Other than that my posts have had nothing to do with the OP.

As for my 16, 19, 24 and 26 year old feelings... I agree there is a huge difference... between all of them not just the 16 year old ones and the rest. I'm wondering... apart from the law... what makes "18" some sort of magical number when your feelings become valid?

I didn't say your feelings weren't "valid" at 16, but are more likely to change and more quickly.

But look at the stats of those that marry young and those that wait:

"Figures released last year from the National Center for Health Statistics
found nearly half of marriages in which the bride is 18 or younger end in
separation or divorce within 10 years. For brides 25 and older, half as many
marriages break up."
(from the Associated Press)

This means that there is twice as much chance you will divorce if you marry at 18 than if you do at 25. That's why your feelings are more "valid" the older you get.

I see... I misunderstood what you were getting at. :)

Now that's where biology and all the hormone talks come in.

I don't recall telling him to do otherwise :rolleyes: :vsign:

Perhaps... but it's not like I was completely irrational when I was that age. Nor are all 16 year olds completely irrational.

Coming back to the topic... I guess it doesn't help to be dismissive of anyone's feelings.

I guess I was saying that in general.

I don't think anyone would deny that they truly think they are in love when they are 16. I am just saying, look at the biology and the statistics and you will see that what I mean.

I look back at my own crushes at that time and laugh. I thought I knew myself and knew the world.

in many countries' legislation it is added that if the adult has/had reason to believe that the person he/she has engage with in a sexual act is/was above age of consent, he or she is not deemed to have done anything illegal. this can for instance be, the adult was lied to or the minor looked or in some way gave the appearance of being be of or above the age of consent.

the above is however not applicable to the poster's question since he/she seems very aware of the girl's age.

to the poster, be extremely careful since there seems to be some ambiguity whether age of consent is 13 years old or 18 years as it seems to be indirectly referred to in the child welfare law.

LOL...i have..

It's because they have the "DADDY COMPLEX"

i do have to agree with salv.... getting with a 16yr old...well thats not really cricket is it...

women mature...at 19-21...that when they are in thier PRIME!!

also they are probably better at giving head than a 16 year old...

still if she wants to splay her legs for that dude....
then thats her decision...
she's 16...
so mature enough to know it mite hurt a little at first :P

although....
YCB is clearly in effect
(You Could do BETTER)
she is probably VERY flat chested....
sure she might have a tight little lady glove....
but believe me...you dont need to be shagin high school students to experience that.... just find a girl that knows what a pelvic floor is ;)

but if you MUST fuck her..... then PLEASE be sure to fuck her off soon after...

cos its not love...its infatuation...and thats fine...

but it would be ALOT more healthy...to just shag the little miss's brains out for a couple of nights...or weeks...and then drop her...

than to be in a relationship with her...

the attraction is clearly physical...
so don't get all namby pamby with emotions...

also...think about this...

your walking down the street in tokyo...with your little lolita.....
and 3 super hot 19-21 yr old girls walk past....
you could have had them before...but they see you holding hands with a 16yr old...

they just gonna think your a loser

THIS data has absolutely no validity in regards to this conversation...

the reason teen brides get divorced more is due to many factors..

you cannot say this is because they were not in touch with "true" or "Valid" emotions at that time....

you have presented data...well done....but you have not the skills, or expertise to draw a meaningful conclusion from that...
nor do you even have the data...

in order to come to a conclusion you would need more information

what were the reasons for divorce...
where there children involved...
How much was each respective partner earning...
which relationship model did the couple adopt..

etc. etc. etc.

you do not have this information
thus your conclusion is flawed and invalid

Wow.. You Seem To Know Alot.. Lol. You Been There? And You Do Know That This Information Is Going To Simply Trash His Life And Not To Mention The Girl's Too. But Hey, Lets Hope That He Reads The Entire Thread. =) And This Is Rather Blunt.. giving head? splay her legs? ....

look mate...

allow me to spell it out...

she is young...16...he is young also...

much better...have a beautifull moment...and keep a nice memory...

than engage in some relationship...that is 99% sure to fail miserably and emotionally....

if he fucks her barins out....shows her the pleasure her body is capable of feeling...while making it clear they can never "go out"....
then she will be gratefull...
both parties leave with GOOD memories...

if he encourages her to have emotions...and says he feels them too...and then ends up BREAKING HER HEART....

guess who's gonna go run to daddy and tell him all about the bad things the nasty Gajin did to her....

i would not advise or condine his actions...

but if he must...then HE should show a grain of maturity....
and keep it light and breezy....to do anything else....is not sensible


and yes i know alot....but only about girls and geo-political movements :P

oh and cycling....i am the god of cycling around London....

though having said that...i did manage to get lost last nite....which IS VERY embarresing....as i used to be a courier and am supposed to know my way around this fair city...yet after being slightly incapacitated...ended up taking the scenic route home....