Quote:
Originally Posted by Nagareboshi
I don't think it's necessary to be using "kudasai", it sounds really repetitive.
Here's my version:
anata ni Daiji na koto wo mamotte, akiramenaide, nigenaide.
Jibun wo shinjite, tomodachi wo shinjite.
Itsumo hokorashige ni ikite
I had trouble with the last sentence as well, so I'm not sure how correct it is.
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Since the speaker is talking to himself (I think, judging by OP's most recent comment), there is no need to use -nasai form, and I think using kudasai would be odd. But I could be wrong.
Note that you still have to use an imperative form for the final verb in each of these sentences (which I have corrected and used -te form since you chose -te form for the rest of the verbs).
What I warrant here is that my corrections make this the best translation posted so far. However, as I'm not a native, I suggest you take even my translation with a grain of salt. Still, the only flaw I could see in my proffered translation is the choice of using -te form. Since OP is talking to himself, I don't see a reason to add anything on to the end.
Without the "anata ni" at the beginning, it translates to "protect important things" rather than "protect things important to you." "Hokorashige ni" means "proudly." See these examples:
“proudly”の検索結果（25 件）：英辞郎 on the Web：スペースアルク
Although I will inquire: Why does OP want to put this somewhere for himself when he can't even read it? Objectification of the language again, I suppose. Not for appreciation of the language, but for appreciation of "how coooooool" the language is.