[RealJames]

Originally Posted by MMM

RealJames, something about your gf's grandparents sits funny with me. Saying it's "cool" she is dating a foreigner and wanting to constantly take pictures with you seems like back-handed progressivism to me.

If I were dating an African-American woman and my grandparents talked about how "cool" that was and had her pose for pictures with them, I would be VERY embarrassed and uncomfortable.

I had quite a few friends when I lived in Japan, and am still friends with a handful of them. The reason we became fairly good friends is because they didn't care that I was a foreigner. They liked me for me, not for my race or country of origin.

I, as I am sure you have, met plenty of people that wanted to be friends with me for no other reason than I am American. As I weeded out the riff-raff I was dragged to plenty of bars and introduced to plenty of people I had nothing in common with and little to talk about with. I was the "trophy friend" and it was not that fun or interesting.

Yeah her grandparents are incredibly racist, it's a twisted way to approve of me, but it does show the changing times, that her grandparents friends would think highly of her family for having an international relationship in it.

I have also heard of foreigners being invited to weddings where they were so out of place just so there was an international presence there, to glorify the ordeal.

And yes I have met loads of people that have wanted to be friends simple because I'm white, to be seen in public with me, because I can speak English, because I have blue eyes, because I can get them girls, etc etc, it sucks finding out who your true friends are when it comes down to it. But, I do think this is a representation of how Japan is embracing internationalism, wanting to have a friend because he's a foreigner, as opposed to shunning him, that's a symbol in itself, isn't it?

Originally Posted by Nyororin

I think that the issue of dating a foreigner is being confused with actually marrying one.

In terms of family reaction, there is a huge difference. Most people will react with interest, fascination, approval, or even admiration when it comes to having a dating relationship with a foreigner. Move on to talk of marriage and the tables turn VERY quickly.
[...]
I think that you might be surprised to see the difference in reactions for "dating" and "planning to marry".

I think you're right, possibly because of communication problems splitting the family. I don't think the motives for it are based in racism, just practicality... don't you think so?

Originally Posted by missprincess

hmm cool topic,
and btw interacial couples have the hottest kids! (i can vouch for that since every single guy ive pretty much ever like has been mixed race)

you're SO right!!! my god mix raced chicks are soooo hot!! (*googles mixed race chicks*)