昔の作文発見！

[masaegu]

On a visit to my parents' home last weekend, I found a composition that I had done for school back in 6th grade. I am posting it in its entirety without editting in the hope that you get to see how an average Japanese 6th-grader writes.

You may ask me about any parts of it.
___________

『ぼくの趣味』

（ＳＣＨＯＯＬ　ＮＡＭＥ）小学校６年５組
（ＭＹ　ＮＡＭＥ）

ぼくの趣味は切手を集めることです。記念切手や古い切 手など、今４００枚くらいあります。集め始めたきっか けは、友達の家に遊びに行った時に友達が集めている切 手を見せてもらい、とてもきれいだと思ったことです。

外国の切手も何十枚かありますが、ぼくは日本の切手の 方が色がきれいでデザインもよいと思います。日本の切 手の中で特に気に入っているのは美人画や浮世絵の風景 画のものです。国立公園の切手も数多くあります。昔の 日本は本当にきれいな国だったことがわかります。

自分の部屋で切手を見ていると、まるで自分が時間を超 えて旅をしているような気分になることがあります。小 さな切手ですが、色々な想像ができておもしろいです。 自分が生まれる前の風景や、行ったことのない場所の景 色を見ていると本当にあきません。ぼくがほしいと思っ ている切手はまだまだ沢山ありますが、高いのであまり 買えません。大人になったら沢山買いたいと思います。

実は最近、チョコレートなどのお菓子の包み紙も集め始 めたのですが、母に「そんなのは女の子がすることだ」 とこっぴどく叱られてしまい、集めるのをやめてしまい ました。特にヨーロッパのお菓子の包み紙は色やデザイ ンが日本のものとは全く違っていて、とても気に入って いたので残念です。内緒で集めていきたいと思っていま す。

[Sumippi]

６年生のお子さんの文章とは思えないほどきれいでまと まっていますね～さすがまさえぐさん…昔からよくおで きになるお坊ちゃんでいらしたんではないでしょうか… またまた惚れ直してしまいます…私の６年生の頃の作文 など…恥ずかしくてお読みいただけるような代物では… orz　

[KyleGoetz]

I will definitely come back and ask questions tomorrow. I'm just busy with work and a musical I am in. I just don't want you to go "oh no one cares" before I get a chance to respond, and you ditch us!

[masaegu]

Originally Posted by Sumippi

６年生のお子さんの文章とは思えないほどきれいでまと まっていますね～さすがまさえぐさん…昔からよくおで きになるお坊ちゃんでいらしたんではないでしょうか… またまた惚れ直してしまいます…私の６年生の頃の作文 など…恥ずかしくてお読みいただけるような代物では… orz　

私も今頃になって恥ずかしい気がしてきました。 　消してしまいたいくらいですが、誰かひとりでも日本 語学習者の参考にしていただければと思い、そのままに しておきます。

お菓子の包み紙の件は結局すぐにやめてしまったですが 、はたちの頃、ドイツにそれ専門の美術館があることを テレビ番組で知り、自分の小学時代の趣味は決して誤っ たものではなかったのだと思いました。その事を母に伝 えたら、「あんたそんなもん集めとった？覚えがないわ 。」とサラ～っと言われたのです。あれだけ怒鳴り散ら して収集を辞めさせたくせに・・・　

[masaegu]

Originally Posted by KyleGoetz

I will definitely come back and ask questions tomorrow. I'm just busy with work and a musical I am in. I just don't want you to go "oh no one cares" before I get a chance to respond, and you ditch us!

Ain't no hurry; Take your time. I sure have ditched a few fellas on here but you ain't one of'em!

[SHAD0W]

Aww Masaegu! Ain't that cute! You were a very good writer back in the day, when comparing to writers in the UK of the same age, your work stands out. Many people find it difficult to write about themselves.

Do you still collect stamps?

[TerenceLau]

Interesting read. More interesting because it's something about you.

Is there any tips to writing in Japanese specifically? A lot of times I find myself stuck in writing/describing technical matters, like research data/report. When I read your passage or writings of my native classmates, I'd think, it's so clean and easy to understand, how do you do that? I wanna learn it!

[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by TerenceLau

Interesting read. More interesting because it's something about you.

Is there any tips to writing in Japanese specifically? A lot of times I find myself stuck in writing/describing technical matters, like research data/report. When I read your passage or writings of my native classmates, I'd think, it's so clean and easy to understand, how do you do that? I wanna learn it!

I recently bought a really good book from a Japanese bookstore in Chicago (there on business). It's called 文章力が身につく本：できる人は文章も上手い！ Sections include:
主語をはっきり出す
主語と述語を近づける
具体的・客観的に伝える
読点を感覚で打たない
「が」は逆説のときしか使わない
「〜だろう」を多用しない
漢字とひらがなを使い分ける
何でも「こと」「もの」で片付けない

[TBox]

After all the troubles I've been having lately, it's very encouraging to know that there IS a level of Japanese I can read at, even if it's elementary school. Thank you.

[masaegu]

Originally Posted by SHAD0W

Aww Masaegu! Ain't that cute! You were a very good writer back in the day, when comparing to writers in the UK of the same age, your work stands out. Many people find it difficult to write about themselves.

Do you still collect stamps?

Thanks, laddie! It's hard to believe there were days when I had no beard, ain't it?

Unfortunately, that hobby of mine only lasted a few years. During elementary and junior high, I collected everything from stamps to miniature cars, rocks to fossils, manga books to records, etc., making my bedroom look like a World's Smallest Museum of Miscellany. I have not collected anything since about 9th grade.

Originally Posted by TerenceLau

Interesting read. More interesting because it's something about you.

Is there any tips to writing in Japanese specifically? A lot of times I find myself stuck in writing/describing technical matters, like research data/report. When I read your passage or writings of my native classmates, I'd think, it's so clean and easy to understand, how do you do that? I wanna learn it!

Well, I think this is a difficult question because Japanese is my first language and I just know what sounds natural without even thinking. My ears just tell me what is good or better.　When writing Japanese or any other language as a foreign language, one tends to translate from one's first language and this can lead to unnatural-sounding writing in the target language.

I wrote this compo when I was in 6th grade, and like any other 6th-grader in the world, I had already written hundreds of pages and read thousands in my native language since 1st grade. So it is all fair in the end. My English probably looks just as horrible as some Japanese-learner's Japanese.