Am I wasting my time at 48 years old?

[IcewindDude]

Originally Posted by PaulK

Dear KyleGoetz,


Obviosuly you are very proficient in the language and have a lot of advice for those who want to learn. Why waste your time with me. Help others. Like I wrote, I appreciated the kind, non-judgmental responses of the first two members who replied to my post, you must have better things to do with your time.

Just for your information. I have not lived in Japan for 7 years consecutively. The last 5 were in the Middle East. But, I suppose you're also a fluent Arab speaker, so I have absolutely no excuses for not being fluent in Arabic and Japanese.

I am not working. Cannot find a job here in my humble corner of rural Japan. I guess that is another defect you could highlight and jump on me about.

I am sure you're a great person and obviosuy very intelligent. What I would not give to able to speak Japanese like you, but the fact of the matter is, I can't.


My Best to You,

Paul

Don't mind the resident antagonist... he's always like that

[PaulK]

Thank you Seiki

[PaulK]

Sorry, and thak you too IcewindDude.

Sincerely,

Paul

[MMM]

I feel like I was forgotten at the Oscars.

[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by PaulK

Dear KyleGoetz,


Obviosuly you are very proficient in the language and have a lot of advice for those who want to learn. Why waste your time with me. Help others. Like I wrote, I appreciated the kind, non-judgmental responses of the first two members who replied to my post, you must have better things to do with your time.

Forgive me for giving you a solution ("talk to people").

Just for your information. I have not lived in Japan for 7 years consecutively. The last 5 were in the Middle East.

Sorry, but I must have misunderstood when you said "I am lived in Japan on and off for about 7 years"

But, I suppose you're also a fluent Arab speaker, so I have absolutely no excuses for not being fluent in Arabic and Japanese.

This is completely irrelevant and illogical—what was the purpose of this statement? I just don't understand what you spending 5 years in the ME has to do with me speaking Japanese and you speaking Japanese? If you lived in an Arabic-speaking country and cannot speak Arabic after five years, you are doing something wrong. Period. It is a matter of fact, not some put-down. You should get out and talk to people. It's foolproof. Absolutely foolproof. And yet you're here decrying my help. Sure I'm going to say it rudely: You have a Japanese wife you refuse to speak Japanese with. You are your own impediment. If you'd speak Japanese with her (not have her give you lessons, just have her talk and you try to talk back! This is how children learn, and they become natives!), you'd get better very quickly.

I am not working. Cannot find a job here in my humble corner of rural Japan. I guess that is another defect you could highlight and jump on me about.

Nope. You're just creating strawmen to try and divert attention away from my (likely apt) deduction that you're not speaking Japanese enough to learn it. You're in Japan. You've been there "off and on for 7 years." You are married to a Japanese citizen. The only possible explanation for why you don't speak Japanese at a very fluent level is either (1) motivational or (2) cerebral. I took the polite route and went with the first, which is lack of motivation. The alternative is that you literally have something wrong with the language center of your brain. I'm saying this academically, not to put you down. If you have something wrong with the language center of your brain, I feel sorry for you.

But I cannot possibly feel sorry for someone who (1) lives in Japan (2) and is married to a Japanese person, yet for 7 years has not progressed to a level to carry on a simple conversation! You are just plain doing it wrong, and when I tell you what to do, you create strawmen and try to make it seem like I'm just being rude! You are the one being rude. I give you help. You insult me and ignore my proffered help!

I am sure you're a great person and obviosuy very intelligent. What I would not give to able to speak Japanese like you, but the fact of the matter is, I can't.

Follow my advice and I guaranfriggintee you you will succeed. I did it. You can do it.

[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by IcewindDude

Don't mind the resident antagonist... he's always like that

Yeah, Heaven forbid no one slap this guy upside the head and point out the flamingly obvious problem: He refuses to speak Japanese.

[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by MMM

I feel like I was forgotten at the Oscars.

MMM, I think you're more of a curmudgeon. I'm more of a bipolar antagonist/superniceguy. It's just selective memory that people remember my rude moments.

Remember a year ago when I came to this board and some guy with a mohawk was being mean to me and AlanX was defending him? How quickly I took over that guy's role! I regret this to a certain extent, and also notice that I tend to be curt with people behaving counterproductively with great velocity. I'm quite nice to those who obviously have put in the time. See, e.g., any of my comments to YuriTokoro on the English board, my highly civil discussions with MMM and Nago.

Actually, come to think of it, I'm actually quite nice. I went back to check out my past posts, and if you ignore this "48 yo" thread, every post on the first page of my posting history is a neutral or friendly comment. Not a single negative one. Selective memory.

Additionally, as some whom I've been rude to on this board can testify, I will send PMs apologizing to people, particularly if MMM has locked a thread before I get a chance to.

Of course, I will never, ever apologize for being rude to those dumb and tactless enough to get a tattoo in a language they have no connection to.

In any case, this post devolved from my podium trophy-reception speech acknowledging MMM into a self-defense.

I do try to be nice, guys. It's just that you only remember when I'm not!

[MMM]

I was talking about the fact the OP didn't mention my post, but gave individual thanks to everyone else. Maybe I wasn't so helpful.

And believe it or not I knew a guy that lived in Kyoto for 11 years as a University Prof, and spoke maybe 10 words in japanese. I find it hard to believe, too, but it happens.

[KyleGoetz]

Originally Posted by MMM

I was talking about the fact the OP didn't mention my post, but gave individual thanks to everyone else. Maybe I wasn't so helpful.

And believe it or not I knew a guy that lived in Kyoto for 11 years as a University Prof, and spoke maybe 10 words in japanese. I find it hard to believe, too, but it happens.

Oh, I believe it happens. I saw classmates of mine at Obirin fail to progress because they continued to speak English constantly and didn't go out to practice Japanese in real-world situations.

This prof in Kyoto must have done the same thing. I mean, if he could only speak with such an extremely limited vocabulary, we know he wasn't doing things in Japanese!

And, to be fair to you, you're only curmudgeonly when your role as mod requires it.

[andylaurel]

I don't think age has a whole lot to do with it (after the 2nd critical period.)
My Japanese has increased 10 fold since arriving in Japan 18 months ago and I attribute that to;
a)My Japanese girlfriend only speaks to me in Japanese.
b)My Japanese colleagues speak to me in Japanese.
c)I spend a respectable amount of time studying.
d)I have a reasonably good ear for languages.

Having said that, I have students who are simply not talented at languages. This is ironic given that they are studying at an English School. If you fall into that category, then the road ahead will be bumpier.